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The most exciting part of poker is anytime someone goes all in.  This is a type of bet where the player commits his entire stack of chips. Even if it’s not a huge amount of money. Not the point. What matters is the commitment. The courageous, binary decision to jump into this situation unreservedly involved, without equivocation.  Because in poker, there is no fence. You’re either in or you’re…

Being the arbiter of moral rectitude is very rarely welcomed.  In fact, it’s usually met with ungenerous opposition.  Like when you go out to eat with a group of friends or colleagues, and upon ordering something healthy, all the sudden you get the chorus of eye rolls. People joke about how you are make everyone else feel bad. They make passive aggressive and backhanded remarks about your conscious choices….

During the coronavirus pandemic, nametags started to take on new meaning.  Particularly in hospitals. Doctors, nurses, and other healthcare professionals are legally required to keep their distance, interacting with patients only under excessive layers of protective equipment.  My friends who worked in medicine told me it made them feel deeply disconnected. But certain healthcare workers found clever ways to help patients feel less alone and more joyful.  Scripps hospital…

According to the national coalition against domestic violence, an average of twenty people are physically abused by intimate partners every minute.  It’s a sad and terrifying reality of modern relationships.  And the worst part is, abusers are highly skilled at shifting the blame for their toxic behavior. They are experts at finding excuses to dodge any and all responsibility.  Consider several of the most common abuse justifications.  It wasn’t…

Everything seems inevitable and logical in retrospect.  But for now, reason is being invaded by history. Tumbling down a fantastic realm where logic and reason no longer applied, there seems to be no objective moral framework in the unforgiving chaos of this absurd universe.  This is difficult for our primitive egos to comprehend.  Because nobody wants to admit they’ve seen something that their education or experience can’t explain. That…

We must remember that we are okay.  Vandijk’s research on calming the emotional storm identifies a subtle phenomenon called an invalidating environment.  It’s where we are taught that our emotions are wrong inappropriate or not okay. The underlying message is to not feel what we are feeling.  Like the hyper critical parent who offers an infuriating nonstop commentary on our shortcomings. Or the insensitive teacher who tells us that getting angry is…

My mentor once gave me a priceless piece of business advice.  Once you’ve sold something, don’t buy it back. Just get your money and walk away. Resist the urge to justify the purchase, over explain the product or excessively thank the customer. Be grateful for the sale and go make another one.  It’s not only great advice for making sales, but also for making decisions.  Because for many people,…

Sobriety is less about the act of consumption and more about the command of oneself.  It’s about the independence from craving. Not allowing things to consume us, so to speak.  Public health agencies have done a helpful job of reframing the official definition of sobriety. They refer to it as the achievement and maintenance of control over, and equilibrium in, our life in general.  Interestingly enough, they mention that…

Years ago, a popular national news show wanted to feature me as a human interest story on their upcoming episode about luck.  They asked if they could follow me around for a day to see how wearing a nametag helped open doors with strangers, create connections and stack the cards in my favor.  Sounds fun, so let’s do it.  But when the crew showed up at my apartment, the…

Recentresearchfrom a federal library found that we are a shockingly wasteful country.  The study showed that more than sixty percent of the energy that flows through our economy is ultimately wasted. Between fuel inputs such as coal and natural gas, and the end use energy consumption for residential, industrial and transportation purposes, less than half of that fuel was constructively used at the end of the day.  One data…