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There are as many paths in the world as there are people to take them.  Which means not everybody you encounter will understand and relate to your unique approach to life.  And that’s fine. One man’s weirdness is another man’s refuge.  What matters is making peace with that weirdness in ourselves. Taking pride in our own habits and needs, and not abandoning them on a moment’s notice just because…

When nothing seems to be going well for us, the easiest thing to do is blame it on our lack of external support.  Surely it must be the people and the environment and the surroundings in which we operate that are the causes of our discontent. But once we accrue enough savings to abandon this soul deadening job and move to the country and get married and open a farm…

We all grow wedded to our accustomed ways.  We hold onto the deep grooves of holy habit, carved into our lives over and over by repetition. And we become so familiar to our choices and routines and lifestyle, that they don’t even seem weird anymore.  Silverman observed it best in her comedy special when she joked, nothing seems crazy when you’re used to it.  However, somewhere down the line,…

There is an interesting term that gardeners use for how long it takes a particular plant to go from germination to flowering.  It’s called days to bloom.  Most seed packets will include the expected number on the package itself, so we can plan appropriately.  But nature is a fickle and fleeting mistress. Maturity value, like any prediction, is never perfectly defined. Days to bloom depends on several factors, many…

Adorno’s controversial book about the jargon of authenticity makes a key point about the struggle for belonging: Shelteredness is an existential value that we all long for, and the experience of home will only come to be when it has freed itself from particularity.  And so, for those of us curious to press on in search of where our we belong, we must open and expand and evolve our own definition of the…

What is the definition of honest work?  Perhaps it means a career that isn’t the best paying. Or a project that is unglamorous, but legal and useful to the world. Maybe honest work is a holding a mundane day job that provides a living for your family, even though it’s not your primary meaning container for holding your hopes and dreams.  Then again, honest work might refer to a…

We don’t get what we deserve, we get what we negotiate.  And so, if we are waiting for our success to be delivered to our door like a pizza, praying that this next big opportunity will finally be one thing that changes everything forever, entirely by itself, without us really doing anything, then we are going to be waiting a very long time.  Because there is no deserve. There…

Acheson, the secretary of state who played a central role in defining the foreign policy of our nation, famously said: The great corrupter of public man is the ego, and looking at in the mirror distracts one’s attention from the problem.  As such, it’s worth unpacking some of the assumptions connected to this ego.  First, we assume that our ego is always out to protect itself at the expense…

Masters writes a gorgeous definition of power in his book about the transformation through intimacy: Power is the capacity to act effectively, to generate significant change and to impose our will on our environment, both inner and outer.  This definition is worth parsing out word by word.  Effective, meaning the belief in our capabilities to organize and execute whatever courses of action that the moment requires.  Generate, meaning bringing forth some…

Accepting low paying gigs. Saying yes to mediocre opportunities. Acquiescing to the comfortable vortex of the middle market. Compromising our fee just to get our foot in the door.  Discounting our value because we’re afraid of turning down new work. Violating the boundaries of our generosity just to make an impression. Allowing ourselves to be flattered into free labor.  These are just some of habits that trap us in…