Writhing time burns on without our consent

Falling in love has been called a socially acceptable form of insanity.

It’s also been called the most prudent form of accident in our lives.

But that’s the beauty of it. The fact that you can’t make love happen by going out and looking for it is what makes it so special. It’s called falling in love because falling is an activity that you can’t do on purpose.

For example, have you ever watched a soccer game where a player was faking injury? It’s pure theater. The player stumbles to the ground, winces in pain, throws his hands up in the air and screams bloody murder, trying to get the crowd on his side, hoping the referee will throw a red or yellow card for the other team.

The acting is laughably bad. There are entire websites with video compilations dedicated to catching players in the act of pretending to fall. There’s even a study that reviewed the most recent world cup and reported more than two hours of something they called writing time, in only thirty games.

Out of the three hundred separate instances of players appearing to be very seriously hurt, two hundred and ninety of the players were back up and playing within seconds. Only nine players were actually injured.

Nice try, but pretending to fall doesn’t work.

Everyone from the referees to the crowd to the fans at home know that it’s all for show.

That’s essentially how love works. It’s not something that can be faked, forced or fabricated. Despite people’s best efforts to control and contain the fires in each other’s hearts, love burns on without our consent. And it hurts like hell.

One good kiss can scramble your brain for a week. One look from a person can make you question everything you thought you knew about yourself.

After my first coffee date with my wife, I went home and forgot to eat dinner. And I love dinner.

Therefore, the best thing for us to do when we fall in love, is to just feel the burn. To surrender to the fire and let it scorch us.

It’s writhing time, as the research study named it. Because if physics has taught us anything, it’s that heat expands matter. Things change their entire shape, area, and volume in response to heat. We should all be so lucky.

If you’ve ever been a relationship that was cold, you know that finding someone who makes you expand is far more preferable than someone who makes you contract.

So now that I think about it, love isn’t like soccer at all. Because in love, there is no game to play. There is no side to take. There are no opponents. And the scoreboard doesn’t exist.

It’s just two people who stumble into the arena and try to create a relationship where winning is no longer necessary.

Sound insane? You’re right.

But at least when you fall in love, somebody else is there to writhe on the ground with you.


Are you willing to surrender your heart to the fire?


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Author. Speaker. Strategist. Songwriter. Filmmaker. Inventor. Gameshow Host. World Record Holder. I also wear a nametag 24-7. Even to bed.
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