How to Help People Lead Themselves

March 26, 2009 8:00 AM

If you want to grow bigger ears, remember these four words:

Let THEM say it.

Even if you have the answer.
Even if you’re totally right.
Even if what needs to be said is SO obvious.

Let them say it.

Think of yourself as a “Listening Midwife.” Your job is to assist people in giving birth to their own understanding.

As The Listener, you’re trying to uncover truth together. So, the challenge is to give people a chance to peel back another layer of intentions, desires and feelings. The challenge is to lead them down the road to understanding. The challenge is to stay neutral so your objectivity enables people to discover their own solutions and, ultimately, lead themselves.

AND HERE’S THE BEST PART: When you “let them say it,” a few cool things happen…

First:
Their answer is more rich.
Their answer is more right.
Their answer is more precise.
Their answer is more accurate.
Their answer is more expeditious.
Their answer is more THEIRS.

Second:
You help them access their own ideas.
You help them end up with better ideas.
You help their mind to think for the second time.
You help them set up conditions to find the answer with the same brain that asked the question.

Ultimately, by not taking sides, by “letting them say it,” you bolster their self-reliance.

Here’s a list of Phrases That Payses to help people lead themselves:

1. What else do you think about this?
2. So, what does that tell you?
3. So, what do you think that means?
4. Is there anything else?
5. What are you going to do?
6. What do you think is the best solution?
7. What would you do if YOU were you?

REMEMBER: If you want people’s dreams, desires and truths to come to the surface – as well as stick around ON the surface – you’ve got to enable them to lead themselves.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
How could you turn this person into a genius?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For the list called, “37 Personal Leadership Questions Guaranteed to Shake Your Soul,” send an email to me, and I’ll send you the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Coach, Entrepreneur
[email protected]

Never the same speech twice.
Always about approachability.