Determining our lives by external data

Anytime we start complaining about something we can’t control, unhappiness awaits.

But anytime we start weighing our options about the things we can control, empowerment ensues.

Here’s an example that everyone should be able relate to:

Have you ever listened to someone bemoan the price of gas, or the cost of the ticket for their daily commute?

If so, did that ever improve their situation?

Of course not. Because the only thing that could have changed that person’s state, or at least motivated that person to take action towards changing their state, would have been focusing on the things that were within their realm of power.

Perhaps brainstorming creative ways to drive less, making a deal with their employer to work remotely twice a week, renegotiating their contract to now include transpiration reimbursement, or god forbid, asking for a raise or finding new ways to make more money so that the extra thirteen dollars a week became inconsequential.

Do you feel the difference?

This posture is rooted in power and proactivity. Even if not a single solution pans out and the person’s commute cost stays exactly the same, the positive experience of brainstorming rather that complaining stretches the mind open to widen the array of possibilities.

Robinson’s book on workaholism explains why this kind of thinking provokes empowerment rather than unhappiness. Positive thinkers are able to cope better with adversity because they can see solutions to stressful problems. Their positive scope widens their worldview, which allows them to take in more information that can lead to better solutions.

Whereas simply complaining fails to take into account the full picture.

Lesson learned, we often have more coping mechanisms than we realize. The key is interrupting the spiral of negative thinking before it gets out of control. Brainstorming and coming up with possible ways to fix the problem instead of getting stuck in the protest mode.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
Are you taking realistic, constructive steps to deal with life instead of succumbing to it?