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Opposites attract, but that doesn’t mean they stay together. I spent several years with someone who, in many ways, was the mathematical opposite of me. Different attitude, different lifestyle, different goals, different everything. Which, admittedly, was kind of endearing at first. Our personalities seem to compliment each other nicely. But as we got more serious, and as my friends started dropping more hints, I learned that what we lacked…

Not everything needs to be understood. That’s hard for a lot of us to understand. Especially if we’re the kind of people who think, reflect, evaluate, replay and over analyze everything that happens to us, in an effort to make sense of our own existence. But in the portfolio of life experience, whatever happens to us will always be a part of us. The hard part is trusting that…

It’s okay to ask people to be there for us. In those moments when the fury of the tempest leaves us tossed and tattered, we should never hesitate to call in the cavalry. They love it. People want nothing more than the opportunity to show up for someone they care about. That’s why they became our friends in the first place. Not because we have the same shoe size,…

Nobody commits anymore. Not just because it’s hard to commit, but because it’s easy to bail. When picking a vendor, picking a university, picking a home, even picking a mate, technology dissolves loyalty. With instant access to an unlimited reservoir of choices, every additional option makes it harder and harder to stick with something. The problem, then, is not just our fear of commitment – it’s our surplus of…

You’ve chosen an uncertain path. You’ve adopted an inconvenient lifestyle. You’ve embarked upon an unconventional journey. You’ve felt the voice inside you growing more urgent. You’ve committed yourself enough so you can’t turn back. IN SHORT: You’ve decided to play for keeps. This is the critical crossroads – the emotional turning point – in the life of every young artist. And I’ve been there myself. From my latest book,…

The real beauty is when we can be ugly together. When we can join each other in a safe space of honesty and imperfection and give voice to the darkest, most perverse sides of ourselves. Somewhere we can set shame aside and let vulnerability meet vulgarity, without the fear of being judged. We might do coffee with friends. Have dinner club with colleagues. Share at storytelling open mic nights….

When times are tough, it’s a lot harder to believe our own bullshit. Anyone can self-rationalize when there’s money in the bank, clients in the pipeline and projects in the works. That’s like riding a bicycle downhill and assuming our legs are strong. But when the phone stops ringing, when the obligations start accumulating, and when we’re not sure where the next check is coming from, there’s only so…

Most of the time, email is everyone else’s agenda for our time. It’s the digital fidget we sit around waiting to react to, the easiest way to preserve the illusion of productivity and the constant distraction that prevents us from executing what matters most. Then again, I’ve received emails that changed my perspective forever, like the man who commented how my entire career came from something in a trashcan….

The other night I had dinner with a group of travel agents. I was curious how the economic, technological and generational shifts were affecting their industry, so I asked what the future of their profession looked like. And without skipping a beat, this one woman launched into a story that blew my mind. About a week ago, she was talking to the cashier at a local bakery. When the…

It costs nothing to have a voice. Actually, that’s not entirely true. It costs your privacy, your safety, your vulnerability, your pride, your addiction to permission, your need for control, your ego, your time, your sweat, your blood, your reputation, your emotional labor, possibly your job, sometimes your relationships and, in a few devastating cases, your life. But that’s it.