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A genuine accomplishment worth taking pride in
One of our goals in life is to make ourselves proud. To experience the euphoric satisfaction from having lived up to our expectations for ourselves. And the good news is, that feeling isn’t limited solely to the external accomplishments we’ve been told are worth celebrating. There are also internal victories that induce just as much satisfaction. Along my own emotional and existential journey, for example, I find it exhilarating to watch…
The idea is the umbrella of all employment
Here’s a pen, and here’s a pad of paper. Separately, they have limited value. But once you learn to put that pen to the paper, and fill it with something original, that’s significantly more valuable than the individual parts. Because it’s idea creation. And the idea is the great umbrella of all employment. Hell, the idea doesn’t even have to be good. It just has to exist. That’s your leverage and…
Are you chatty or listeny?
Epictetus once said that human beings have two ears and one mouth so they can listen twice as much as they speak. It’s a corny sentiment, but it’s also an effective strategy. And this is coming from a professional performer and extrovert who loves talking to people, cherishes an engaging conversation and feels completely comfortable interacting with almost anybody. But still, I never enjoyed talking just for the sake…
If our desire has atrophied into obligation
Goldthwaite famously said that we should keep quitting until we end up some place where we don’t want to leave. It’s a brilliant, albeit bruising approach to the dreaming process. But it also implies a key question. How do you decide when it’s time to let go, and when it’s time to dig deeper to keep your dream alive? Nobody knows. Because nobody talks about it. This country doesn’t…
Limitations are the doorways to our deepest value
There’s no need to panic at the thought of our own weaknesses. They’re worth making friends with. In fact, once we know what they are, and once we’re willing to face them head on, these weaknesses can actually become strengths. During the second world war, a small population of aerial observers were specifically recruited because they were colorblind. Turns out, their condition made them unable to distinguish military equipment…
Have you ever shot a charging lion?
Humans first developed the ability to feel anxious because it was evolutionarily advantageous. Butterflies in the stomach helped protect the tribe from incoming predators. But that was a million years ago. The modern day problem with anxiety is, it makes our minds contract. It seduces us into focusing on the immediate threat without considering the broader context of our lives. We allow one bad mood, one fruitless moment or…
Walk away in kindhearted acceptance and get on with your life
If you’re still bloodying your knuckles on doors that you know are not going to open, it’s time to hang up your wrists and stop knocking. There is a such thing as misguided persistence. And it can work against you. It’s overwhelming to the person being pursued, and it’s frustrating and counterproductive for the person doing the pursuing. Eventually, you have to just stand in graceful surrender, walk away in kindhearted acceptance and…
Make art that prides itself on its unreality
Fargo opens with a disclaimer: The movie a true story, that the events depicted in this film actually did take place, and at the request of the survivors, the names have been changed, and out of respect for the dead, the rest has been told exactly as it occurred. What’s interesting, though, is that once the movie is over, the end credits bear the opposing disclaimer. It states: All characters…
Set aside your innocence for a moment
What I regret most in my life are the failures of discernment. Situations in which I was too flattered to be suspicious, too passionate to be critical, too poised in a great ballet of expectation and entitlement to be selective, and too focused on my own ego to realize that this exciting new business opportunity was really just another opportunity not to get paid for something. Yet another cruel hoax dangled before…
Scoring a joy point
Mellin’s groundbreaking research on rewiring the human brain found that long term survival is predicated on our capacity to marshal an effective joy response. That the chemical ripples of electricity and pleasure that we feel in our bodies when we relentlessly pursue the gentle and nourishing practice of joy are the most effective defense against stress that we have. And so, our challenge is to organize our lives around…