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Net worth is defined as the total assets minus total outside liabilities of an individual.  But that’s purely in economics terms. And any problem that can be solved with money isn’t all that interesting.  From an existential perspective, however, the term has a completely different meaning. Net worth is what you have when everything else goes away.  It’s that which nobody can steal from you. The love you can never lose….

We are not eating for flavor, they’re eating for familiarity.  For some comfort that could never come from food.  When I think back to the last few times I’ve inhaled an entire large pizza in one sitting, it makes perfect sense. It’s just so goddamn tempting to use addiction as a way to handle existential crises.  But in the end, we all know that it’s another dark and lonely…

Buber once wrote that most men preferred to forget how many possibilities are open to them.  That’s why the great companion of change is curiosity. To practice thinking to ourselves: I wonder how this transition will shape me. I wonder what hidden benefits might lay beneath this mountain of adversity. I wonder what the opportunity for growth and expansion will be. I wonder how many parts of myself I…

Cameron’s book on transitions is a collection of empowerment prayers on the nature of change and coping.  One of the arguments she makes is how we mistakenly become so focused on life as we year for it, that we neglect to live the life that we have. We think to ourselves, okay, well, once this is over, then I’ll get on with my life.  Once this is over, then I’ll get back to being kind…

I recently met the publisher of food and dining magazine who had a fascinating approach to handling upset customers.  Whenever his company makes a mistake that causes an influx of angry emails and phone calls, his strategy works as follows.  Announce, apologize, remediate, explain and apologize again.  Announce, meaning acknowledging and owning the problem immediately. Because the speed of the response is the response. Apologize, meaning saying you’re sorry…

A friend of mine runs the call center for a nonprofit that has millions of members worldwide.  In order to get all of her employees on the same page, she implemented an internal program called tissue issues. Every morning before her team shows up for work, leaders hang up support reports the on the bathroom stalls and walls.  That way, every employee from every department has no choice but to be…

Most people who ask us for help don’t actually want it.  Help is just a safe word. A convenient veneer of civility layered over a deeper human need that is being sought out, like being seen and heard, feeling a sense of confirmation and affirmation and knowing that they’re not crazy and alone in the world.  And so, when people come to us in need of wise counsel, before…

I’ve always appreciated the idiom, your eyes were bigger than your stomach.  It’s the common mistake of taking more food on your plate than you can eat. Especially when going out for sushi. You just can’t help yourself. The food is just so delicious and colorful and healthy and fresh, that the thrill of eating it almost always causes you to overestimate how much your stomach can handle.  But…

The more irons you have in the fire, the less time you have to cry over spilled milk.  The sheer volume of projects simply won’t allow for that kind of unnecessary dwelling and sulking.  That’s how entrepreneurs keep up a steady pace of work and efficiently insulate themselves against the inevitable disasters and rejections and disappointments of doing business. The managing of multiple projects at any given time becomes a…

We don’t have to wait until we are completely free from suffering to take positive action in the world.  That’s just an excuse. A clever way of taking ourselves off the hook. A slick trick that uses pity to justify procrastination.  And the worst part is, nobody calls bullshit on us for doing it, out of the fear of appearing cold, insensitive and uncompassionate towards our pain.  But the…