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Since the early eighties, parents, teachers, advertisers and television personalities have assured children that they were special. That they’re not like the others. And that the gifts they posses are unique and value and someday, somewhere, somebody is finally going to recognize just how amazing they really are, tap them on the shoulder and promptly reward them with the opportunity of a lifetime.  This message was pounded into my…

Macintosh users all dread the same moment.  It’s the spinning rainbow pinwheel of death.  If you’re not familiar with this icon, it’s a variation of the mouse pointer arrow that is used in the mac operating system to indicate that an application is busy.  It’s utterly infuriating. The entire system freezes up. Whatever you’re working on locks down. And you feel helpless because all you can do is sit…

I used to work for a boss who would tell the new hires: Never go into a meeting without an opinion. Sitting in silence doesn’t help the team or help your chances of getting hired. Speak up, argue and debate.  This is a critical balance in group dynamics. Because on one hand, we don’t want to take over the group and monopolize the conversation and bulldoze every idea in…

Csikszentmihalyi, the psychologist who pioneered the theory of flow, explains that every flow experience contributes to the growth of the self.  After each episode, we’re a little different from what we were before. Our consciousness inputs fresh information about what our selves are.  This is not an insignificant victory. Any effort to chase down and expand the authentic self is valuable. Because it proves that we’re making progress in…

Never walk into a meeting empty handed.  Show up with ideas. Physically written out on paper. And when the time is right, don’t just hand it over, deliver it.  This practice is not only fun, memorable, unexpected, engaging and creative, but it also speaks volumes about the kind of person you are.  Somebody who brings value. Somebody who invests personal preparation and perspiration into their appointments. Somebody who knows…

Gilbert’s memoir on creative living beyond fear makes an inspiring case against rejection.  She writes that when she used to get rejection letters from editors, she would permit her ego to say the following aloud.  You think you can scare me off? I’ve got another fifty years to wear you down. There are people who haven’t even been born yet who are going to reject me someday. That’s how…

Rand’s character notes in the afterword of her legendary novel are fascinating.  She actually wrote them several years before the publication of the book itself. Not for any outside reader, but for the clarity of her own understanding.  And what’s interesting is, although the notes weren’t included in the final manuscript, they’re still some of the most important words in the book.  Roark, our protagonist, is depicted in both…

I once saw a group of guys at bachelor party walking through a casino.  Each of them was wearing a powder blue shirt with the icon of a bride and groom at the altar, chained to the phrase, game over.  What a perfect microcosm for how our culture views marriage. How it’s the ultimate loss of freedom. Hence, the bachelor party. One last chance to enjoy the sweet nectar of…

Romeo was first smitten by another maiden.  Rosaline, one of the unseen characters in the play, was involved in a short lived romance with our hero, who expressed dismay at her not loving him back.  Juliet, of course, walked into the costume ball and changed everything. The moment our protagonist lays his eyes upon her, good old what’s her name is history. And he expresses one of the most…

I recently heard an interview with renowned chef who compared her career to getting a tattoo.  There was never any plan, she laughed. Every single choice and endeavor focused around what felt pleasurable in the moment, and she trusted that this new tattoo, which was now stuck on her body forever, would create a residual ongoing effect that nobody could ever take away from her.  It’s a deeply courageous…