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Here’s a cool paradox. For certain things, we don’t need as much as we think we do. And for other things, we need much more than we think we do. Take the concept of time. The story we’ve told ourselves is that if we only had a few more hours in the day or one extra day in the week, we’d cross off everything on our list. But time,…

Who has let you down in the past month? Maybe it was a friend who bailed on the concert at the last minute. Or a coworker who didn’t meet your project deadline. Perhaps a public figure who accidentally said something offensive during a press conference. Or maybe the barista at the coffee shop put the wrong kind of milk in your drink. The list goes on and on. There…

The most rewarding thing we can do is update our definition of humility. We accept that it’s not a strategy, program, goal, posture or technique. It’s not something we try to be. Nobody wakes up in the morning and just resolves to be humbler. We can’t slip on humility like a pair of wool socks. We can’t whip or will ourselves into a state of modesty like an ascetic…

Nothing seems crazy when you’re used to it. Whether it’s an abusive relationship, a toxic workplace, a compulsive habit, or some other harmful circumstance, you never realize how bad it was until you walk away and heal from it all. It’s only when you get to the other side and find the happiness you didn’t know you could feel, that you see your past with straight eyes. But that’s…

Multiple studies have shown that young people are having less sex than previous generations. The exact reasons for this trend are debatable, but one thing’s for sure. Sex isn’t the problem, it’s the symptom. What’s more concerning is our culture’s broader withdrawal from physical and emotional intimacy. And it’s hard not to appreciate the allure. Why waste our time and energy on the vulnerable, gradual and reciprocal exchange of…

Moderation has never really worked for my personality. Despite my best efforts to adopt an everything in moderation maxim, turns out I’m an all or nothing kind of guy. Timing and monitoring and measuring my effort doesn’t motivate me, it exhausts and frustrates me. Framing my level of activity and consumption as sensible, whatever the hell that means, only ruins the experience for me. Unlike some people, occasionally indulging…

Complaining is satisfying because it relieves tension, earns validation, builds connection and enables catharsis. What’s not to like? To quote one of my favorite comedians, the thing about sitting in your own shit is, it’s warm, it’s familiar and it’s yours. But the danger is when people spend more time complaining about their situation than solving it. Trapped in a doom loop of their own making, they forget one…

Aristotle was the first philosopher to systematize logical errors into a handy list. He referred to them as the thirteen fallacies, one of which is called the irrelevant conclusion. It’s when an argument is given, from which a perfectly valid, sound conclusion could be drawn, but despite having all the information, people come to a conclusion so wrong that it’s even further from correct. Movies and television portray these…

Mizzou scientists discovered that cell phone separation can have serious psychological and physiological effects on users. Their study demonstrated that our phones are capable of becoming an extension of our selves such that when separated, we experience a lessening of self and a negative physiological state. What’s most fascinating to me is the questionnaire itself. Because so many of the line items can be easily and quickly refuted with…

For most of my young adult life, goals motivated me to do things. The experience of setting, documenting, sharing, reviewing, achieving and reflecting upon them was a significant source of satisfaction for me. Until it wasn’t. Until it occurred to me that the hedonic treadmill really has no end. Goals are for the person you are when you set them, not necessarily the person you’re going to be when…