Tag: scott ginsberg

Talk with your pads

My football coach at Parkway North (Go Vikes!) had a great motto for sportsmanship:

“Talk with your pads.”

His vision for our team was one of character and maturity, not just strength and ability.

And that’s why he wouldn’t stand for ANY player who talked trash to the other team.

“You guys are bigger than that,” Coach Parks would say. “You don’t need to stoop down to their level. If you hear a player on the other team running his mouth at you, don’t say a word. When a real man needs to let out his emotions and prove his worth, he talks with his pads.”

So we did. We talked with our pads.

And that’s exactly why were we undefeated.

Well, that AND we had this running back named Mel Dog that was really, really fast.

But the lesson within Coach Parks’ motto, “Talk with your pads,” goes way beyond sportsmanship.

You can apply it to business, too.

EXAMPLE: Some professional feel the need to talk a big game so they can elevate themselves above their colleagues and competitors.

The key word being, “talk”

Which is exactly what they spend most of their time doing: talking.

Not working.
Not taking action.
Not accomplishing anything.

Just talking.

The problem is, when you “just talk,” (without supportive action and ability) it’s really hard for people to hear you over the sound of your own inflated ego.

On the other hand, talking with your pads is a LOT louder.

Because it’s jolting.
Because it’s honest.
Because it’s self-evident.

AND THE BEST PART IS: When you talk with your pads, people actually perk up and listen.

So, consider these suggestions:

Talk with your pages.
Don’t brag to your fellow authors about how many books you’ve got in the pipeline. Just do your work. Just write, every single day, even if you’re not in the mood.
And when people see your long list of titles on Amazon, you won’t have to say another word.

Talk with your visibility.
Don’t brag to your fellow entrepreneurs about how great your business is doing. Just do your work. Just be visible in the media, in the community and on the web. And when people see how many (other) people are talking about you, you won’t have to say another word.

Talk with your order sheets.
Don’t brag to your fellow salespeople about how many prospects you’re working on. Just do your work. Just deliver value and enable people to buy. And when they see your stack of order sheets, you won’t have to say anything another word.

Remember:

Powerful people don’t scream.
Powerful people don’t talk trash.
Powerful people don’t talk much at all.

They just do their work. They talk with their pads.

And others listen.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
Are you talking or doing?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For a copy of my 153 Quotations to Inspire Your Success, send an email to [email protected] and I’ll send you the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
[email protected]

Who’s telling their friends about YOU?

Tune in to The Marketing Channel on NametagTV.com!

Watch video lessons on spreading the word!

Author & “Nametag Guy” Scott Ginsberg to host St. Louis Writing Marathon!

Inspired by Natalie Godlberg’s Writing Down the Bones, this December I’ll be hosting the first (of many, hopefully…)

St. Louis Writing Marathon!

WHO: Anyone who needs to write.

WHAT: For $20, you get a quiet place where you can quietly write, all day, with no distractions.

WHERE: The Clayton Center, St. Louis, MO.

WHY: Because writing is the basis of all wealth.

More details here!

Frankly, I don’t care if six people show up.

Because WE’LL still get to write all day🙂

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What did you write today?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For the list called, “10 Reasons You’re NOT Blogging Yet,” send an email to me, and I’ll send you the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
[email protected]

Been writing that book for 14 years?

Bummer. Perhaps I could help on a more personal, one-on-one basis.

Rent Scott’s Brain today!

NametagTV: Exploration, not Accusation

Video not working? Click here for Adobe Flash 9.

Watch the original video on NametagTV.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
Do your words accuse or explore?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For a list called, “79 Questions Every Manager Needs to Ask,” send an email to me, and I’ll send you the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
[email protected]

Want your employees to come to YOU?

Buy Scott’s new book and learn the secrets!

Pick up your copy (or a case!) right here.

Why hotel rooms are your ticket to creativity

A few weeks ago I missed my flight from Toledo to St. Louis.

I ended up staying in some dumpy hotel next to the airport, ordering a pizza, renting a movie and calling it a night.

I flew home the next morning.

This type of thing happens to me every so often. Maybe once a year.

And while it used to frustrate me, I’ve now come to realize an important truth:

Hotel rooms provide a sterile, neutral environment where your heart can sing loudly.

Nothing on the walls but whiteness.
Nothing on the desk but plainness.
Nothing on the bed but blankness.

Ah, the hotel room. A beautiful place to be creative!

It’s just you and … YOU.

A venue to constantly confront yourself, just BE, and just WRITE.

Sigh…

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What unexpected venues heighten your creativity?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For the list called, “9 Things Every Writer Needs to Do Every Day,” send an email to me, and I’ll send you the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
[email protected]

What’s YOUR approach?

Join The Nametag Forums! Share stories, best practices and connect with a like-minded community of business professionals who stick themselves out there!

Why your competitors are attracting more attention than you

They’re working longer than you.
What time do YOU leave the office?

They’re working harder than you.
What time do you arrive AT the office?

They’re working smarter than you.
Does everything you do lead to something else you do?

They’re better positioned than you.
What are you known for?

They’re easier to get a hold of than you.
How many different ways can people contact you?

They’re asking better questions than you.
Do you have a stockpile of creative, unexpected questions that only YOU ask?

They’re blogging more regularly than you.
What’s your excuse for not blogging everyday – or at all?

They’re ranked higher on Google than you.
What happens when somebody googles YOU?

They’re calling customers back quicker than you.
How quickly do you get back to people?

They’re publishing more online content than you.
What did you write today?

They’re building a bigger permission asset than you.
How big (and how good is your relationship WITH) your email list?

They’re more focused with their marketing than you.
What slice of a slice have you chosen to specialize IN and be known FOR?

They’re being talked about more frequently than you.
Are you giving people a reason to tell their friends about you?

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What is your Attention Attraction Plan?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For the list called, “23 Ways to Make Your Fans Super Happy,” send an email to me, and I’ll send you the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
[email protected]

Nobody talking about your business?

Bummer. Perhaps I could help on a more personal, one-on-one basis.

Rent Scott’s Brain today!

Grow Bigger Ears: Being a Patient Listener

My definition of listening is, “Loving someone with your ears.”

This brings to mind a common scripture quoted at many wedding ceremonies:

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes and always perseveres.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

THEREFORE: If listening is loving, and if loving is patient…

Listening = Patience

(As you can see above, practiced by dog, Paisley.)

Here are four practices to help your grow patient ears:

1. Have faith in the process. Natalie, my yoga instructor, constantly reminds her students to be patient and with and have faith in themselves during class.

“Remember, you have sixty seconds to execute this posture,” she’ll say, “So take your time. It’s a marathon, not a sprint. Have faith and trust that your body will be there.”

Similarly, in your listening practice, you need to believe that the speaker’s intention will eventually show up. Even when they’re tap-dancing around the real issues. Even when they’re taking too long to get to the point. Sure, you don’t have all day to sit there in silence, but sometimes you can only probe so much.

NOW HEAR THIS: Faith stands for, “Finally allowing it to happen.”

2. Leading others to lead themselves. Marjorie, a writer I once coached, came to me with a challenge about discipline. Because of her hectic schedule, she was unable to squeeze in regular blocks of time to complete her project.

Eventually, after asking a few questions about her daily schedule, it occurred to me that her problem wasn’t about discipline; it was about time management.

Now, the old, impatient me would have flat-out TOLD her that. But part of being a patient listener – as I’ve learned from countless screw-ups of my own – is leading the other person to lead herself. To paraphrase from Tao Te Ching, “A good leader takes the people to the finish and makes them say, ‘We did it on our own.’”

NOW HEAR THIS: Listen a little and they’ll give you their problem; listen a LOT and they’ll give you their solution.

3. Don’t immediately come to a conclusion. Listening impatience is kind of like stress: everybody manifests it differently. For example, some people tap their pen, others incessantly shake their left leg, while others whip out their Crackberry and start text messaging their boyfriend.

For me, listening impatience has a tendency to manifest in my arm. That is, I ALWAYS have to be the first one in the discussion to ask a question. Sometimes even before the speaker finishes asking, “Do we have any questions?”

“Oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy! I have a question! Me! Me! Me! Pick me! Oh MAN what a great question I’m going to ask! Right here! Right here!”

I know. I’m working on it. And I’ve been this way since I was four years old, so it may take a while.

Anyway, uncontrollable arm ticks aside, here’s the secret to remember: You don’t (always) have to IMMEDIATELY come to a conclusion. Whether you’re practicing patience at a staff meeting, in a seminar or during a meeting with your boss, don’t be so quick to impose your own answers. Just pause. Listen first.

NOW HEAR THIS: Decide if your thought is a reaction or a response.

4. Mobilize people’s inner resources. As The Listener, few things are more beautiful than watching someone realize a truth on their OWN. In The Sacred Art of Listening, author Kay Lindahl writes, “If we’re still like water in a pond, the other person can see his reflection in it.”

That’s your job. To practice attentive silence. To let people see, find, say, do, know, learn and discover on their own. Resist the need to take over while respecting the speaker’s speed of self-discovery. No pushing. No forcing. Gentle nudging. Facilitating a natural process, you enable and nurture the speaker’s rhythm and guide him to make the best choices.

NOW HEAR THIS: When someone is listened to, she can more easily clarify her thoughts and feelings

Now that we’ve identified four key practices to enhance your listening patience, let’s conclude with an affirmation. I suggest you print it out, post it in a visible location and read it daily as reminder of your role as The Listener:

THE PATIENT LISTENER’S CREED

When I pause, I listen to the silences.
When I pause, I respect which questions want to be asked next.

When I speak, it’s only to improve on the silence.
When I speak, it’s to make a difference and contribute to the conversation.

When I engage, I make it easy for others to talk.
When I engage, I grant others adequate space to talk.

When I comment, I choose NOT to inject too much of myself.
When I comment, I choose to contribute to, not disrupt the conversation.
When I comment, I choose to be helpful and not intrude upon the speaker.

I am a Patient Listener, and I know how to love people with my ears.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
How does your listening impatience manifest?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For the list called, “27 Reasons People Aren’t Listening to You,” send an email to me, and I’ll send you the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
[email protected]

How many unsolicited referrals did YOU get this week?

Tune in to The Sales Channel on NametagTV.com!

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How to make a name for yourself without comprising yourself

In the beginning of your career, you have to sort of go overboard on the self-promotion.

Sticking yourself out there to the 100th power, if you will.

(Guilty.)

But I’ve realized that over time, as your success legitimizes and your reputation achieves a sense of wholeness, you don’t have to really do or say as much anymore.

You care less and worry less.
You’re beyond needing to impress people.
You learn to let go of the need for approval.
You no longer seek permission to be yourself.
You’re comfortable in your own beautiful skin, even if it’s hairy, pale, and, in some areas, a little ashy.

This process only happens with personal and professional maturity.

BUT HERE’S THE GOOD NEWS: As you become more congruent and self-actualized, you move away from doing and saying … and move closer to BEING.

My mistakes, mentors and experiences have taught me the following four practices for making a name for yourself in the most authentic way possible:

1. Try NOT making an impression. When you google the phrase, “First impression, “ 11,900,000 hits come up. Clearly, there’s no argument against the value of first impressions – in business or in life.

The challenge is preventing yourself from focusing TOO much on “making an impression.” Because when you do, it usually leaves you flustered. You’re too busy concentrating on outcomes, not activity. Too busy worrying about making an impression that you forget the name of the person you just met. Product, not process.

Ultimately, when you work the hardest to make an impression, you leave the least impact on the people you encounter.

REMEMBER: When you stop trying to impress people, you become the most impressive.

2. Don’t advertise your importance. There’s a difference between being successful and being really good at looking like your successful. There’s a difference between being important and being really good at projecting an image of inflated importance.

Unfortunately, some people don’t know the difference.

This brings to mind another passage from The Tao: “When you over extend your effort, you accomplish the least.”

If you have to tell people you are, you probably aren’t.
If you have to tell people you aren’t, you probably are.

And as Max Lucado says in his best book, “In a desire to be great, you might cease being any good.”

REMEMBER: When you try the least, you do the best.

3. Don’t be too anxious to prove your value. Wait for the right time. The Tao also suggests, “When you argue the loudest, you appear the wrongest. But, when you have nothing to prove, people can trust your words. And because you do not display yourself, people can see your light.”

I learned this the hard way, after nearly three decades of being a terrible listener. Fortunately, I learned that your hand doesn’t always have to shoot up first.

REMEMBER: People will discover your greatness soon enough. Patience.

4. Stop justifying. Your fee. Your value. Your beliefs. Your choices. Your existence. Your expertise. Your behaviors. Your knowledge. Your motivations.

He who talks next loses. So, whatever it is you’re talking about it, state it confidently and then shut up. Don’t feel the need to justify, qualify or prove yourself to anybody.

No buts. No becauses. No only-ifs.

Stop justifying.

REMEMBER: YOU believe it. That’s what matters.

– – –

Making a name for yourself, being approachable, sticking yourself out there, being That Guy … all of these processes CAN be carried without trying so hard.

Without making so much noise.

Without compromising yourself.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What have you recently discovered you’ve been doing wrong for years?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For the list called, “311 Pieces of Contrarian Wisdom,” send an email to me, and I’ll send you the list for free!

Now booking for 2009! The ONLY professional speaker in the world who teaches approachability.

Watch The Nametag Guy in action here.

33 Ways to Spy on Yourself

How often do you spy on yourself?

You know, to see how you’re doing. Checkin’ yourself out. Observing various situations and experiences behind that internal pane of two-way glass, taking furious notes.

It’s becoming kind of a hobby of mine.

But it’s not easy. Part of this process comes from your ability to detach, disassociate and sort of “get out of yourself” for a while, looking inward at your own behavior.

One practice I’ve found to be successful is self-questioning. Gently poking your inner landscape with an inquiry or two about what’s going on in the now.

Here’s a list of 33 Questions to add to your Self Spy Skit.

NOTE: Pick maybe 2-3 examples from this list. (You don’t want to flood your head with TOO many questions or else your brain might explode.)

Practice asking yourself these types questions on a regular basis in a relaxed, yet curious manner.

1. Am I contributing something?
2. Am I learning something?
3. Did I freely choose this value?
4. Do I truly cherish this value?
5. Have I considered other alternatives to this value and explored them fully?
6. Have I directly experienced this, or just heard it many times?
7. How am I making decisions?
8. How am I stepping out of my comfort zone?
9. How am I treating my own intuitive promptings?
10. How’s my breathing?
11. In what ways am I reacting, instead of responding?
12. In what ways am I attacking myself?
13. Is it my place to fix this?
14. Is this a thought or an impulse?
15. Is this as exciting as I thought it would be?
16. Is this consistent with what I value?
17. Is this experience helping me become the best version of myself?
18. Is this information necessary to the excellence of my work?
19. Is this particular problem part of a larger problem?
20. Is this person helping me become the best version of myself?
21. Is this person worth the time and effort it will take to save him?
22. Is this step necessary?
23. Is this thing helping me become the best version of myself?
24. Is what I’m doing RIGHT NOW consistent with my #1 goal?
25. What are the consequences of the choice I’m making?
26. What am I becoming?
27. What am I practicing?
28. What am I questioning?
29. What am I rationalizing?
30. What am I resisting?
31. What am I searching for?
32. What things I’m doing without thinking?
33. What’s the one HUGE thing I’m TOTALLY forgetting?

REMEMBER: Since you ARE spying on yourself, try not to get caught. See if you can create a sense of awareness in which your attention is focused on your own behavior, 100% in the moment, watching yourself as if you were the star of a mystery movie.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
When was the last time you spied on yourself?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For a copy of my list called, “21 Things I Learned While Spying on Myself,” send an email to me, and I’ll send you the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
[email protected]

Is your frontline IN line?

Tune in to The Frontline Channel on NametagTV.com!

Watch video lessons on delivering unforgettable service!

How to Answer a Question, Pt. 1

During my time at Miami University, I was a Marketing Major.

The first piece of advice I remember from my professor, Mrs. Young was:

“In Marketing, the answer to every question is always ‘Well, that depends…’”

The class got a good chuckle out that one.

Amazingly, more than ten years later, that idea still holds true. Not just in marketing, but in ANY question/answer situation:

Between you and your employees.
Between you and your customers.
Between you and the media.

Between you and your significant other.
Between you and your children.
Between you and your dogs.

OK, maybe not your dogs.

STILL: Answering creatively or counterintuitively leads to a higher level of thinking.

Which elevates the conversation to a new level.
Which enables both parties to discover their individual truths.
Which yields more compelling results than if you would have offered a simple yes or no.

Let’s explore a list of ten ways to answer questions in a more intelligent, more approachable way. We’ll do 1-5 in part one today and 6-10 in part two next week.

1. “Well, there are a couple of answers to that question.” Don’t kill yourself trying to come up with ONE answer. Unless the question is about calculus, set your mind free! Resigning yourself to only providing one answer is a creative block.

Conversely, every time you offer multiple answers, you’re strengthening your foundation of creative, expansive thinking. And in the eyes of the questioner, you appear smarter, more open minded and more thorough.

What’s more, single answers have the potential to alienate people. Especially in a group setting. So, by offering multiple responses, you increase the probability of appealing to the largest number of people. More answers = More people on your side.

2. “Well, that depends on how you define the word ‘x.’” As a writer and wordsmith, this is my personal favorite. First, it PROVES that you were (actually) listening. It also shows that you think differently, and that you choose your words carefully.

For example, when someone asks me, “How often do you meditate?” my response is, “Well, that depends on your definition of meditation. If you define the word meditation as ‘formal sitting and quieting of the mind,’ then my answer is ‘twice a day;’ but if you define the word meditation as ‘mindfulness breathing and present moment awareness,’ then my answer is ‘All day.’”

It’s a probability statement, which demonstrates that you honor multiple perspectives. That you practice cognitive flexibility. What’s more approachable than that?

3. Word distinction. Similar to defining (or redefining) a word, you can also make the distinction between two commonly confused or misused words. For example:

QUESTION: “Were you scared?”
ANSWER: “Well, being scared isn’t the same as being afraid.”

QUESTION: “Did you lose the game?”
ANSWER: “We didn’t just lose, we got defeated!”

QUESTION: “Is your business growing?”
ANSWER: “Well, I’m more concerned if my business is flourishing.”

By offering these kinds of distinctions, you maintain control of the conversation AND inspire the other person to think twice about the subtle difference between similar terms.

4. Pause. Don’t say anything. Just think. Listen to your own quiet voice. Take your time. Ponder your response. Let the silence speak to you and then choose your words carefully.

Learn to accept silence as a normal part of conversations. Your contemplation will show respect to the questioner. What’s more, any form of pausing – whether it’s in writing, speaking or singing – automatically increases the … VOLUME … of that which comes before and after it.

5. “Well, let’s take that in pieces…” My friend Richard, a veteran in the mental health profession, often uses this type of answer. Breaking your answer into pieces accomplishes several conversational goals.

First, it demonstrates effective listening.

Second, it exemplifies patience, especially when a client emotionally unloads on you.

Third, it enables the answerer to digest the entirety of the question, thus providing a response that addresses all of the important issues.

– – –
That’s how to answer a question. Here’s part two.

Ans I’m sure there are more possibilities, so…

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
How do YOU answer questions?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For the list called, “62 Types of Questions and Why They Work,” send an email to me, and I’ll send you the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
[email protected]

Sick of selling?
Tired of cold calling?
Bored with traditional prospecting approaches?

Buy Scott’s new book and learn how to sell enable people to buy!

Pick up your copy (or a case!) right here.

To claw or not to claw?

My favorite Japanese saying is:

No aru taka wa tsume o kakusu.

“The strong falcon hides its claws.”

LESSON LEARNED: Overt demonstrations of strength suggest insecurity.

As Lao Tzu explains in The Tao De Ching:

“When you show your strength, you appear weak … when you conceal your power, the more effectively it can be used … when you make your advantage less obvious, the more effective you power becomes.”

This is about being a sleeper.
This is about being underestimated.
This is about being able to sort of “sneak up” on people.

Similarly, in the words of Hide a Dagger Behind a Smile, “Do not make obvious your advantages. Outward measures of a thing’s value hide its true worth. Instead, allow people see you as non-threatening, and your adversaries will offer no resistance.”

REMEMBER: Quiet strength wins.

Just ask Coach Dungy.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
Do you (really) need to show your claws?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For the list called, “17 Ways to become a Thought Leader,” send an email to me, and I’ll send you the list for free!

Never the same speech twice.
Always about approachability.

Watch The Nametag Guy in action here!

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