Are You Offering Content Or Enabling Contact?

People can get information anywhere, anytime, immediately, for free.

But that’s the thing.

We don’t need more access to information – we need more access to each other.

IN SHORT: Contact is the new content.

Which doesn’t make information irrelevant.

But contact offers an unquantifiable humanness that content can’t provide. And if your brand fails to deliver that interaction in addition to the information people need, customers will quickly switch to another brand that will.

Here’s how to install a greater sense of approachability, both online and offline, in your organization’s daily life:1. Give everything a recognizable human touch. Lately I’ve been receiving messages from readers, followers and customers asking if my responses are actually from me, or just some robot disguised as me.

This trend is baffling. Not because people assume I’ve delegated my contact to a machine, but because there are people out there who actually do that. And customers are sick of it. The fact that people even wonder whether or not responses are automated should be enough of warning sign.

I find this detachment from humanity to be embarrassing. In the great game of business, what matters is how you talk to your customers. What matters is your unique way of interacting with people. And that matters is how they experience themselves in relation to you. Don’t outsource the human function. Make sure soul has a palpable presence in your contact efforts. Does your brand give more credence to computers or humans?

2. Provide information plus interaction. Content is great for deepening awareness, but only through contact can you deepen an emotional connection. Only through contact can you truly resonate with the soul of another human being. And whether it’s in person, over the phone or online, here’s the formula:

Create simple, inclusive, accessible, relevant and human encounters that change the momentary experience of engaging with your brand.

Here are a few examples to consider:

*Are you providing people with opportunities to participate, like making blog comments open to the public?
*Are you creating invitations to act and engage with your brand, like running contests on social media platforms?
*Are you creating acts of intimacy in moments of distance, like encouraging clients to upload picture of themselves joyfully using what you sell?

I hope so. Because content without contact is conartistry. What act will you deliver to draw people into the deeper meaning of what your brand does?

3. Shock people with your love. According to a study by the Customer Contact Council, about ten percent of Comcast’s service calls have nothing to do with their products. To leverage this asset, the company recently launched a help service for residential customers.

And now, for a fee, customers can receive help with problematic wireless gaming consoles, personal computers, tablets, smartphones, and networking equipment – none of which are actually Comcast products.

This is the kind of contact you can’t put a price on. The kind of contact worth crossing the street for. And if your brand wants to deliver the same, think about what underleveraged assets you might be able to exploit. Think about what populations of readers, customers or subscribers you might be able to attend to in a delightfully shocking way.

Escort them with your love and watch the fireworks begin. After all, content is a commodity – but contact is a communion. How does your brand deliver unexpected value?

4. Contact plus content equals conquest. As a writer and publisher, content will always be core to my enterprise. But what I’m starting to discover is that the speed of the response is the response.

What I’m starting to learn is that when you’re genuinely and assertively responsive, the medium us the message. Especially in a commoditized marketplace when service is the key differentiator, contact is the primary victory. Contact is the asset that paves the way for future interactions.

Without it, you’re just another content provider who takes forever to provide impatient customers with a human being who speaks in a human voice that solves human problems. Think of it as digital approachability. Keeping the virtual loop open.

Because if you’re not able to solve your people’s problem right away, providing consistent assurance that you’re on the case preserves their sense of control. Do you get back to your customers faster than your competitors, or does information stand in the way of engaging with the people who matter?

5. Information is not a replacement for interaction. Wearing a nametag everyday for a decade changes your behavior: It keeps you accountable, keeps you honest and keeps you true to who you are. That’s why I no longer litter, rarely act like a jerk and never pretend to be someone I’m not.

In the same vein, the greatest advantage of online technology is the ability to connect instantly – but the greatest danger is the option to do so anonymously. And that’s the caveat to contact: Making sure you do without collapsing your identity.

You have to keep your digital nametag on, or you’re going to get yourself into trouble. Because when you retreat into depersonalization and namelessness, you take less responsibility for what you do and say.

On the other hand, when you resist the temptation to engage from a place of anonymity, your actions are more accountable and more human. It all depends on how vulnerable you’re willing to make yourself. Will you stick yourself out there or surrender to the status of anonymous?

REMEMBER: If content is king, contact is queen.

It’s no longer enough to be a content provider – you also have to be a contact enabler.

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Are you giving people more information or more interaction?

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* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Publisher, Artist, Mentor
[email protected]

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How to Take a Chance on Yourself

Gambling is for fools.

It wastes your time.
It burns your money.
It corrupts your thinking.

As Robert DeNiro said in Casino, “The more they play, the more they lose. In the end, the casino gets it all.”

HOWEVER: Some things are worth taking a chance on.

Namely, you.

Here are a few things you might keep in mind: 1. Desire is not an occupation. The first word to delete from your success vocabulary is “aspiring.” Never aspire to anything. Aspiring is for amateurs. Aspiring is the hallmark of working small. Whatever you want to become, start by being that thing already.

Like George Carlin used to say, “There are only two states an oven can possibly exist in: Heated or unheated. Preheated is a meaningless term.”

Where are you still preheating yourself? You either are, or you aren’t. Instead of waiting to be who you are, make the decision to raise your own bar. Go pro. Go full time. Go all in. Start playing for keeps.

Once you know what you believe, everything becomes a lot easier. Once you take a chance on yourself, people will start showing up ready to match your bet. And once you submit your resignation to the purgatory of wannabe, providence will move to orchestrate the ideal conditions to win. Which of your fears are diminishing your commitment?

2. Never underestimate the weight of victory. The scariest part about taking a chance on yourself is not the prospect of failure, but the possibility of success. I don’t know about you, but I can’t imagine anything more terrifying than getting exactly what you want.

Think about it: You might realize it’s not enough. You might become a victim of your own success. You might discover it’s not actually what you thought you wanted. You might mishandle the changes success brings into your life. You might stop taking the creative risks that made you successful in the first place. Or you might fail to live up to the expectations and reputation attached to your success.

At least failure is predictable. At least failure you can read books on. Success is the great unknown. Success is what we’re really afraid of. And that’s why part of us thinks that sometimes; it’s safer to just want things.

Which it is. But safe is a very dangerous place to be. And if you truly want to take a chance on yourself, you have to be prepared for the possibility of victory. Otherwise you’ll never take the time to enjoy it when it comes. Are you emotionally ready for success?

3. Accept the existence of your shadow. Sometimes we’re too close to ourselves to see the truth about ourselves. And if we don’t customize a system for exposing our blind spots, the chance we take on ourselves becomes too risky. As Rob Bell explained in Love Wins:

“When sameness takes over, when everyone shares the same story and when there is no listening to other perspectives – there is no stretching and expanding and opening up.”

That’s why I’m eternally thankful for my girlfriend: Her thinking is often perpendicular to my own. And as my partner, she’s in a unique position to give me an invitation into myself, lead me into my blind spots and remind me of just how moronic I can truly be.

Who’s your partner? Who could you admit into your life as a teacher? Whether it’s your spouse, significant other or business partner, ask them to reveal to you what you’re too in love, too proud or too close to yourself to see. It might hurt your ego, but it definitely helps your chances.

Anytime you can invite intellectual diversity into your life, it makes it easier to expose your unperceivables. What are you afraid to know about yourself?

4. Respect the paradox of the journey. On one hand, your inner dreamer believes you should be more successful by now. On the other, your inner realist knows you have to pay your dues for longer than you’d like to.

But like a good yoga student, you have to achieve balance between total relaxation and complete exertion. And a helpful way of doing so is to ask two questions. First: Where can you afford to be patient? Not idle, not passive, but patient. Because as long as you don’t wait so long that it becomes too late to take action, and as long as you’re not investing valuable time waiting for something that’s never going to happen, it usually pays to wait it out.

Second: Where can you allow yourself to be impatient? Not reckless, not irresponsible, but impatient. Because while patience is a virtue – impatience pays the mortgage. And sometimes you just have to trust yourself, trust the process and gather whatever momentum you can to start moving in the right direction. Otherwise you may never execute anything that matters. How can you be patient and impatient simultaneously?

5. No labels, no limits. Putting things in the right category doesn’t mean you control them – it just means you have more boxes. The reality is: If you have a plan for everything, unexpected turns will never take initiative toward you. If you have a plan for everything, you lose the psychological freedom to pivot into new directions. And if you have a plan for everything, you’ll never be able to live larger than your labels.

Don’t close the door of opportunity on yourself. Instead of creating a false ceiling on what you can accomplish, keep your eye on the things you can’t see. Always ask the question, “What am I afraid to see because it doesn’t fit my nice little plan?” Then, just listen. Because opportunity doesn’t knock – it whispers. And if you’re not paying attention, it will sail right past you.

There’s no shame is having no sense of direction. Try getting lost. Try not knowing. Try flying blind. Because if you don’t know where you’re going, nobody can stop you. Are you leaving enough room for the unexpected?

REMEMBER: You are a risk worth taking.

If you are going to take a chance on something, it may as well be on yourself.

Sure beats playing video poker.

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* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Publisher, Artist, Mentor
[email protected]

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Adventures in Nametagging: Working Out, Allergies and Broaches

“Acts of friendliness in moments of anonymity.”

That’s why I wear a nametag:

To invite people to join me, to remind the world that face to face is making a comeback and to create spontaneous moments of authentic human interaction infused with a spirit of humor, playfulness and connection.

And if a picture is worth a thousand words, a nametag is worth a thousand stories.

Here are my most recent adventures:DAY 3,845. Today I was introduced to my girlfriend’s colleague. As we shook hands, he said, “Nice nametag.” I think it’s interesting when people say this. Nice nametag. As if they were saying, “Nice bike” or “Nice shoes.” For some reason, my default response is usually, “Thanks. I work out.” I wish more people thought that joke was as funny as I did.

DAY 3,846. Today I was sick as hell and didn’t feel like talking to strangers. When the waiter asked me why I was a wearing a nametag, I gave the answer I usually give when I’m not up for explaining the entire story: “Well, you never know…” While that’s a completely vague, uncreative response, it usually works. Sure enough, the waiter didn’t say another word.

DAY 3,847: Today I was at my friend’s wedding. A woman approached me who was wearing a broach made of gold wire. It was shaped into a cursive signature of the name “Cynthia,” and she said, “I just wanted you to know that you’re not the only one at the wedding wearing a nametag.”

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What was your best nametag related adventure?

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* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Publisher, Artist, Mentor
[email protected]

Never the same speech twice.
Now booking for 2011-2012!

Watch The Nametag Guy in action here!

Can I Get a Witness?

During a recent sermon, my mentor shared the following insight:

“Most of what we do has no witness. But it is the sum of our witnesses that creates the picture of who we are.”

That’s when it occurred to me:

Without a witness, your life goes unnoticed.
Without a witness, your life is a series of small incidents.
Without a witness, your life gets redefined as something untrue.
Without a witness, your life lacks affirmation and understanding.

Who are your witnesses? Whom are you witnessing?

Today we’re going to explore a few ideas about the power of witness:1. Hang better mirrors. Success never comes unassisted. And life’s too short to surround yourself with people who don’t challenge and inspire you. But if you never open yourself to be reflected by those people, you may as well be winking in the dark.

Your mission is to find at least one person who will regularly sit you down, look you in the eye and say, “Oh my god, that is freaking brilliant.”

This form of affirmation is like oxygen to your soul. And it’s the validation that will keep you going during hard times. Personally, I’ve been fortunate to have many amazing witnesses in my life. And as a result, I’m not successful because people said I would never make it – I’m successful because people told me I would make it, and I proved them right.

That’s what happens when you surround yourself with the right mirrors: They show us something we can’t see for ourselves, and then we change forever. If you killed someone tomorrow, who is the one person in your life that you could tell – that would still respond positively?

2. Learn how to receive. Giving is easy because you know what to expect. Receiving, on the other hand, is hard. It means you’re out of control. It means you’re vulnerable. And it means you’re letting go and letting people help you.

But if you truly want to be witnessed, you have to be willing to see your own brilliance when people reflect back it to you. Otherwise you insult them by deflecting what they’re trying to show you.

The secret is saying thank you without justification. Extending gratitude without defending yourself. Next time someone pays you a compliment, try just saying two words: Thank you. It’s harder than you think. In fact, this practice takes so much patience, self-control and self-confidence, that most people wouldn’t dare try it.

But the good news is, those receive well earn the right to be witnessed over and over again. When was the last time you held out your hand?

3. Be sensitive to people’s visibility needs. In the movie Shall We Dance, Susan Sarandon says it best:

“When you witness, you’re promising to care about everything: The good things, the bad things, the terrible things and the mundane things – all of it, all the time, every day. You’re saying to people that their life will not go unnoticed because you will notice it. Their life will not go unwitnessed because you will be their witness.”

Who in your life right now feels invisible? Who needs to feel seen?

Be more promiscuous in your love with them. Respond with sensitivity in a time of tragedy. And give them the gift of visibility. Otherwise the utter exhaustion of feeling invisible might become too much for them to bear. How many people did you go out of your way to ignore last week?

4. Mirrors don’t hide the truth. The word “witness” simply means, “to testify.” Which means the easiest way to become indispensible to people’s lives is to sit in the audience of their experience, then accurately tell the world what you saw.

That’s how you acknowledge people, honor people, edify people and celebrate people: By being a stand for their greatness. What’s more, witnessing is the lifeblood longevity. Nobody in their right mind would walk away from a mirror that made them feel more beautiful.

Your task is to be that mirror in people’s lives. To be that perpetual reflection they can’t function without. Focus on that and they’ll keep you around – even during the hard times. When people look at you, what image do you reflect back to them?

5. Make people’s experience immediately available to them. Lately, a lot of my speeches are being tweeted by audience members throughout the entire duration of the presentation.

For marketing purposes, this rocks. Because people see people seeing value in my words. For feedback purposes, this rocks too. Because people tell me what worked best. But for witnessing purposes, this is essential. Especially when the presentation is over, the conference has ended and I’m sitting in the airport alone, waiting for my plane to board.

All I have to do is check my tweet stream to see what my witnesses said.

Your challenge is to set up a similar system. Something gives people permission to reflect your experience back to you in real time. And whether you use a digital platform or a live feedback mechanism, I promise your work will never be the same. It’s amazing how different art becomes when you know people are watching. Who’s testifying your value?

REMEMBER: Each soul is laden with its own story to tell.

But if you have no audience, you’re just winking in the dark.

Everyone needs a witness.
Everyone needs to be a witness.

It’s what makes life worth living.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
Who are your witnesses?

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* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Publisher, Artist, Mentor
[email protected]

“I usually refuse to pay for mentoring. But after Scott’s first brain rental session, the fact that I had paid something to be working with him left my mind – as far as I was concerned, the value of that (and subsequent) exchange of wisdom and knowledge, far outweighed any payment.”

–Gilly Johnson The Australian Mentoring Center

Rent Scott’s Brain today!

6 Steps to a More Fearful You

Fearless people scare me.

It’s one thing to have confidence.
It’s one thing to believe in yourself.

But you’re never scared of anything, there’s something wrong.

Fear is a healthy, human reality. It’s an essential part of the life experience. And sometimes you have to scare yourself for the right reasons.

But if you’re trying to scrub your world clean of it, you’ll never reach your full potential.

HERE’S THE SECRET: Fear isn’t meant to be ignored – it’s meant to be invested.

As my therapist famously told me, “The healthiest way to handle your fear is to change your relationship to it.”

Here are six steps to a more fearful you:1. Instead of fighting with it – bow to it. Accept the bid. Honor it. And greet fear with a welcoming heart. Respond with an expansion; don’t react with a contraction. How to do you extend namaste to that which scares you?

2. Instead of complaining about it – give thanks for it. Be fundamentally affirmative. Extend gratitude for fear’s arrival. It’s here for good reason. Are you grateful for that which scares you?

3. Instead of running from it – make friends with it. Don’t fight. Don’t flight. Don’t freeze. Befriend. That way it can’t hurt you. Are you willing to buddy up with that which scares you?

4. Instead of waging war against it – put your arm around it. By approaching fear as an ally, you redirect its power into something useful. Can you join forces with that which scares you?

5. Instead of putting a blanket over it – learn an important lesson from it. Fear is the final compass for finding what matters. Please listen. Can you grow from that which scares you?

6. Instead of being taken over by it – decide what fuel can be made from it. Fear is a wave waiting to be surfed. Let it carry you to bright new shores. Will you energize your efforts with that which scares you?

REMEMBER: You have nothing to fear but fear of fear itself.

Stop ignoring it and start investing it.

The dividends are worth it.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
When was the last time you scared yourself?

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* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Publisher, Artist, Mentor
[email protected]

Never the same speech twice.

Now booking for 2011-2012!

Watch The Nametag Guy in action here!

To Those Who Would

The more successful you become, the more torpedoes will be shot at you.

But love is the best comeback.

And if you’re willing to be unfair with your heart, it’s amazing what you can accomplish.

Here’s how you can use it:

To those who try to steal your joy, be happy anyway.
To those who try to edit your truth, be yourself anyway.
To those who try to thwart your voice, be heard anyway.
To those who try to crush your spirit, be buoyant anyway.
To those who try to change your spots, be original anyway.
To those who try to silence your courage, be risky anyway.
To those who try to merchandise your soul, be true anyway.
To those who try to erase your name, be remembered anyway.
To those who try to justify your success, be awesome anyway.
To those who try to hypnotize your vision, be focused anyway.
To those who try to lower your average, be exceptional anyway.
To those who try to improve your dreams, be committed anyway
To those who try to belittle your ambitions, be dedicated anyway.
To those who try to vandalize your constitution, be heartstrong anyway.

THAT’S THE RULE: Head up, heart higher.

They’ll never see it coming.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
How do you respond to those who would?

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* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Publisher, Artist, Mentor
[email protected]

Never the same speech twice.

Now booking for 2011-2012!

Watch The Nametag Guy in action here!

Watch Scott Ginsberg’s Entire Keynote Speech on Personal Branding

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What are you known for knowing?

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For a list called, “100 Self-Consultative Questions,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Publisher, Artist, Mentor
[email protected]

“I usually refuse to pay for mentoring. But after Scott’s first brain rental session, the fact that I had paid something to be working with him left my mind – as far as I was concerned, the value of that (and subsequent) exchange of wisdom and knowledge, far outweighed any payment.”

–Gilly Johnson The Australian Mentoring Center

Rent Scott’s Brain today!

Adventures in Nametagging: Thieves, Yogis and Silver Suits

“Acts of friendliness in moments of anonymity.”

That’s why I wear a nametag:

To invite people to join me, to remind the world that face to face is making a comeback and to create spontaneous moments of authentic human interaction infused with a spirit of humor, playfulness and connection.

And if a picture is worth a thousand words, a nametag is worth a thousand stories.

Here are my most recent adventures:DAY 3,842. Today a guy at the coffee shop noticed my nametag. He jokingly asked me if my name was Scott, and I said yes. Then he asked me if I could watch his stuff while he went to the bathroom. I said yes again. Isn’t it amazing how much more we trust someone once we know their name? Maybe I’ll give his wallet back.

DAY 3,843. Today a guy in the yoga locker room noticed my nametag, smiled and asked, “Scott, are you going to the conference, or coming from the conference?” And I told him, “Both.” Maybe that’s all life is. One big, never-ending conference.

DAY 3,844. Today I was in downtown Manhattan when a man in a silver suit deliberately interrupted his phone call to remind me that I was still wearing my nametag. I thanked him and continued walking. Moments like these restore my faith in humanity. I find it reassuring to know that in our hyperspeed, always-on culture, people will still go out of their way to help a stranger in need.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What was your best nametag related adventure?

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For the list called, “8 Ways to Move Quickly on New Opportunities,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Publisher, Artist, Mentor
[email protected]

Never the same speech twice.
Now booking for 2011-2012!

Watch The Nametag Guy in action here!

The Brittany Barton Guide to Filling the Room

Oscar Wilde once said, “Some people cause happiness wherever they go, while others cause happiness whenever they go.”

Which type of person are you?

IT ALL DEPENDS: When you walk into a room, what do you fill it with?

Filling the room is about choosing how you want to show up.
Filling the room is about establishing an emotional identity.
Filling the room is about leaving the room better than you found it.

In honor of my girlfriend’s birthday, we’re going to explore a few possibilities for filling the room:1. Fill the room with laughter. My girlfriend has a laugh that could end a war. A laugh so expressive, so energetic and so uninhibited that people look up from their plates just to see whose mouth it came from. And I’ll never forget commenting on it during one of our first dates, to which Brittany replied:

“I never laugh small.”

Can you imagine how different the room would feel if you practiced that philosophy? After all, laughter isn’t just contagious – it’s constructive. It fosters relaxation, enables listening and builds trust.

Unfortunately, most of us never allow ourselves to laugh big enough. We check to see if anyone else is laughing first. We suppress our laughter for fear of drawing attention to ourselves. And we never exhale as powerfully as our spirit requires. As a result, the only thing we fill the room with is self-consciousness.

Let your funny bone lose. Stop laughing small. People won’t ask you to leave – they’ll ask you sit next to them. When you walk into a room, how does it change?

2. Fill the room with mirrors. During a recent sermon, my mentor shared the following insight: “Most of what we do has no witness. But it is the sum of our witnesses that creates the picture of who we are.”

Whom are you witnessing? Whom are you reflecting? Because without a witness, people’s lives go unnoticed. Without a witness, people’s value goes unaffirmed.

Your goal is become a walking mirror. Someone who reflects people’s reality. Someone who gives people front row seats to their own brilliance. And someone who makes people’s own experience immediately available to them. After all, approachability isn’t about being the life of the party – it’s about bringing other people to life at the party.

Forget about whom you know. Focus on whose life is better because you reflect it back to them. People never walk away from a mirror that makes them feel more beautiful. How are you laying a foundation of affirmation?

3. Fill the room with soul. People want to feel. They want to emotionally vibrate. And they want to sense a palpable presence of something real and true. In short: They crave soul. And if you can deliver that everything you do, the room will never be the same.

Here’s how: First, soul comes from heartfelt individual expression. Are you speaking the language of the heart or the handbook? Second, soul comes from giving everything a recognizable human touch. Do you use technology when it would be more memorable to do it by hand? And third, soul comes from exhibiting naked personhood. Are you willing to take your private values into the public arena?

The point is, how you talk to your customers, your unique way of interacting with people, is what makes your brand matter. How could you turn every room you enter into a place where soul finds expression?

4. Fill the room with possibility. Every time I give a presentation, I give my audience permission not to listen to me. Not to ignore my words – but to listen to their own reactions to my words. That way, they can get lost and arrive at a destination of their own making.

Yes, it’s an unorthodox approach to audience engagement. But in my experience, that’s where possibility lives, that’s when creativity flourishes and that’s how inspiration grows. Ah, the beauty of crowdsourcing.

The challenge is: You have to surrender. You have to keep the loop open. Otherwise your room becomes a closed ecosystem locked in a daydream of the past. But if you’re willing to be vulnerable, if you’re willing to open the door and invite everybody in, the room will fill with more possibility than you ever could have done alone. How are you creating an environment where people can think for themselves?

5. Fill the room with gratitude. Gratitude is not a chore. It’s not a corporate initiative. And it’s not an annual act of forced kindness that makes you feel good about yourself. It’s a way of life, a way treating people and a way of showing up.

What’s more, gratitude isn’t an event – it’s an ongoing process. A calendar of consistent action. The secret is, gratitude is more than just giving gifts. It’s about letting people know that they matter to you – then demonstrating how they matter to you in front of an audience.

Because while people love to hear how great they are, they long to hear how great you’ve become because of who they are. Making thankfulness a non-negotiable. What gift could you give someone that would erase the memory of every other gift they’ve ever received?

REMEMBER: You can’t own the room until you fill it with something that matters first.

The choice is yours.

Be like Brittany.

Bring happiness wherever you go, not whenever you go.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
When you walk into a room, how does it change?

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For the list called, “52 Random Insights to Grow Your Business,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Publisher, Artist, Mentor
[email protected]

Never the same speech twice.

Now booking for 2011-2012!

Watch The Nametag Guy in action here!

The Art of Unfairness

It’s hard to love people who betray you.
It’s hard to love people who disrespect you.
It’s hard to love people who appear perfect.
It’s hard to love people who try your patience.
It’s hard to love people who tear at your hearts.

That’s not fair.

It’s hard to love people who cause you suffering.
It’s hard to love people who never say thank you.
It’s hard to love people who openly criticize you.
It’s hard to love people who repel you emotionally.

That’s not fair.

It’s hard to love people who treat you with contempt.
It’s hard to love people who don’t know how to receive.
It’s hard to love people who always take and never give.
It’s hard to love people who live in a state of ugliness.

That’s not fair.

BUT THAT’S THE THING: Love isn’t supposed to be fair.

If it was, it wouldn’t be love – it would be strategy.

Silly rabbit. Fairness is for kids.

THE WAY LOVE WORKS IS: It finds the people who don’t deserve it – then offers itself to them freely and fully when they least expect it.

If you want to master the art of unfairness, consider these practices:1. Don’t give – pour. Love is a respiratory requirement. And when you breathe out the love people need, they gasp with joy. Next time you see an opportunity to keep quiet, tell the truth. Especially when there’s no reason to be honest. Lavish and heap and overwhelm people with it. How strong is your honesty asset?

2. Don’t imply – express. Love is the great eraser. And it reminds you that every minor incident is not a supertragedy. Next time someone reflexively apologizes to you for a minor inconvenience, immediately respond by saying, “I forgive you.” What types of people are you afraid to give the benefit of the doubt?

3. Don’t fight – bow. Love is the best comeback. The more successful you become, the more torpedoes will be shot at you. And that’s not fair either. Next time someone rips your art to shreds, say this: “I respect your opinion of my work.” Are you willing to idle your motor even when you feel like grinding your gears?

3. Don’t thank – gush. Love is a brand that is built by hand. Next time you’re debating how to show people how essential they are, write a love letter in the form of something else. Give it away freely and without expectation. And the more handmade, the better. What unsolicited token of love could you give today?

4. Don’t hoard – spray. Love doesn’t discriminate. It should be shared with the people who cannot love you back. No matter how unfair that is. Next time you encounter a tormentor; love them with a constant heart. Even you know for sure that they’re wrong. Are you willing to fall in love with things most people are turned off by?

5. Don’t extract – overflow. Bring forth your heart in every action. Instead of trying to dilute the distaste, just pour in more love. Next time you start a new relationship or partnership with someone, say this: “I want to learn all your little quirks, just so I can say I love you anyway.” Are you demanding that the people who love you change their essential nature so you feel more comfortable?

6. Don’t contract – affirm. When you do what you love, the hatred will follow. That’s not fair either. Next time someone lashes out at you because they know they’re not doing what they love, say this: “I’m so glad you shared that with me. Feedback like yours inspires the hell out of me.” How are you laying a foundation of affirmation with people who are hard to thank?

7. Don’t shine – reflect. If you want people to fall in love with you, help them fall in love with themselves first. Next time you want someone to adore their own reflection, give them a front row seat to their own brilliance. Do you love yourself enough to get out of the way so other people can articulate their fabulousness?

8. Don’t withhold – express. The best way to change the world is to love it first. Next time you want to transform the spirit of people you’re with, love them until they ask you why. Be indiscriminate and promiscuous. Break yourself open and pour yourself out. Are you willing to love something to death to bring it to life?

9. Don’t whine – expand. You can’t keep your door locked. Love means caring when it’s inconvenient. No matter how unfair it feels. Next time you encounter someone most people view as a nuisance, love at a time when opening seems impossible. Are you willing to accept that you don’t need anyone to love you back?

10. Don’t evade – mend. There’s nothing that won’t reveal itself if you love it enough. Next time you get a chance to answer the call to love, stop long enough for your heart to open. And believe that there’s nothing love can’t heal. Have you committed to accepting love from everyone and everything?

11. Don’t suppress – broadcast. What we love shapes us. And your life is measured by how you love. Next time you leave the house, love like it’s a rare jewel that costs everything, but give it away freely like it’s nothing. Are you famous for the people who love you and the way that you love them?

12. Don’t isolate – breathe. Love means showing up when you’re scared. And then leaving room for the other person to decide. That’s not fair. Next time you find yourself on a bended knee, look love in the eye, succumb to its softness and take joy in the moment. Are you caught up in your relationship or just dwelling in your love?

13. Don’t conceal – expose. Love changes the architecture of the heart. And it’s a response to your greatest values found in another person. Next time someone calls you crazy for wearing your heart on your sleeve, say this: “I can’t help it – love does this to me.” Will your love help you discover yourself in others?

14. Don’t require – offer. Love meets a closed heart with kindness. That’s definitely not fair. Next time your ego attempts to turn love into a scorecard, try this: Focus on being a more loving person without worrying about what you’re getting in return. Are you afraid to extend your heart to people who disagree with you?

REMEMBER: If you only love people when it’s fair, you haven’t learned anything.

Maybe it’s time to stop being so darn fair with your heart.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
How unfair are you willing to be?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For the list called, “38 Ways to Make Customers Gasp,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Publisher, Artist, Mentor
[email protected]

Never the same speech twice.

Now booking for 2011-2012!

Watch The Nametag Guy in action here!

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