But deep down, he’s a really good guy…

He might be a jerk…
He might be a lazy, unmotivated cheater…
He might instigate fights with all the people from accounting…
He might screw around and get into trouble a lot…

…but deep down, he’s a really good guy.

Right.

Let me tell you something: deep down doesn’t matter.

People only give you credit for that which they SEE you do consistently.

Think about it: if someone says, “Yeah, but deep down, he’s a really good guy,” that probably means: “up front, he’s a real asshole.”

I once contributed to an article for the Wall Street Journal. According to their research, someone you’ve just met will form a first impression about you in two seconds.

TWO SECONDS.

Which means:

Deep down, even if you are a “really good guy,” most of the people you encounter are never going to have enough time to figure that out.

So, you have a choice:

1. Maintain unity and congruency in your personality at all levels
2. Or deep down, just be a really good guy

Face it: it’s just not cool to be an asshole.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
Do you know someone who, deep down, is a really good guy?

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
Author/Speaker/That Guy with the Nametag
www.hellomynameisscott.com

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People buy people first

I’d just finished a speech with group of sales managers at a Fortune 500 company. After everyone cleared out of the room, my client came up to me with a huge smile on his face.

“Great job Scott! I’ve been getting awesome feedback. You truly resonated with my staff!”

“Cool, that’s what I like to hear,” I replied.

Steve sat down in the chair in front of me. He leaned back, put his feet up and said, “You know Scott, I gotta be honest: I hire a lot of outside trainers just like yourself. And as valuable as your message of approachability is, the real reason I chose you … is because I LIKED you.”

Wow. So there it was. Just like that. Because he liked me.

LESSON LEARNED: people buy people first.

Before your company.
Before your products.
Before your services.

They buy YOU first.

Before your ideas.
Before your suggestions.
Before your work.

They buy YOU first.

THEREFORE: you owe it to yourself to put your values before vocation. Beliefs before business. Person before profession. Individuality before industry.

Here’s how. I call it The ABC’s of Leading with Your Person:

A is for attitude.
(Cliché but true!) Sun Tzu said, “What you believe about yourself, the world will believe about you.” So, before you sell a product, idea or service, first sell yourself on yourself. Because if you don’t like you, nobody else will.

How much time do you spend each day selling yourself to yourself?

B is for breathing.
…your person through every possible touch point, that is. The way you answer the phone, type emails, engage in person, or appear on paper – all of these are different channels through which you have an opportunity to communicate your person FIRST. It’s like Seth Godin says, “The only thing people judge about you is how an engagement with you makes them feel.”

Do your communication channels define you by what you do or who you are?

C is for consistency.
Ever run into one of your coworkers outside of the office and think, “Oh my God! Jan from Accounting?! She’s like a completely different person!”

It’s a bummer when that happens. I feel like I see it a lot. Not exactly consistent, huh?

Now I know, I know: some people work in jobs that require them to be someone different compared to who they are when they’re off the clock.

Those people should find new jobs.

When was the last time someone told you “tone down” your real self?

Attitude.
Breathing.
Consistency.

That’s how you lead with your person. Got it?

Cool.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
How do you lead with your person?

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
Author/Speaker/That Guy with the Nametag

Are you That Guy?

Find out in Scott’s new book at www.hellomynameisscott.com!

The World is a Mirror, Part 6

A is for ATTITUDE
B is for BREAK PATTERNS
C is for CONSISTENCY
D is for DISCIPLINE
E is for EVOLUTION
F is for FRIENDLINESS

Friendly always wins.

Cheesy? Maybe. But it’s true. It’s not possible to go wrong with friendliness.

It’s also not possible to max out on friendliness. You can always increase it. And I only say that because after all these years of wearing a nametag to make other people friendlier, a major improvement I’ve noticed in my life is: I’ve actually become friendlier myself.

I’m tellin ya, this stuff works. The moment you boost your friendliness is the moment you experience the follow payoffs:

People are rarely mean to you.
I’ve seen the meanest people in the world do complete 180’s because of friendliness. This reminds me of Tim Sanders’ book The Likability Factor. His research proves that you should never allow yourself to communicate unfriendliness as a first step because, as a social reflex, people will generally reciprocate your friendliness (or lack thereof).

Your cool factor goes up.
A Canadian University did a study on the link between friendliness and “coolness.” They based their findings on a survey of 800 respondents — mostly twentysomething university students — who were asked to rate on a scale of one to seven — one being uncool, and seven being very cool — the coolness of 90 adjectives. They then asked the same respondents to rate the same 90 adjectives according to their social desirability. And what they found was a strong correlation between the two. In other words, the qualities that make one socially desirable — being friendly, fair, thoughtful and kind — were also what makes one cool — at least in the minds of about 60 per cent of participants.

Stress is reduced.
Just like you, I’ve missed flights, lost luggage, received bad service, been cut off in traffic or been knocked into in the middle of a crowded bar. Now, because I’m human, my natural reaction is to get upset. But I don’t. I always catch a glimpse of that little nametag in the corner of my eye before I yell, “Watch where you’re going jerk,” and I’m reminded to act friendly. In 2,080 days, I’ve rarely become SO pissed off to the point of yelling or complaining. Instead, I’ve learned to react patiently and, most importantly, friendly. It’s never steered me wrong. And I’m sure it’s reduced my overall stress level.

The point is, even the nicest person in the world can still become friendlier. The benefits are scientifically based and 100% true.

This stuff works. Friendly always wins.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
In what area of your life could you be friendlier?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
Think of the friendliest person you know: are people mean to them? Are they cool? Are they stressed?

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
Author/Speaker/That Guy with the Nametag

Do you want to be That Guy?

Find out how in 20 days with the release of Scott’s forthcoming third book!

Check out www.hellomynameisscott.com for all the juicy details!

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Tag: people buy people first

But deep down, he’s a really good guy…

People buy people first

The World is a Mirror, Part 6