Are You Trying to Make a Sale or Earn the Right to a Relationship?

It’s one thing to be generous, give gifts, make an impression and create a moment worth remembering.

But if you’re hoping to run up the
score just to guilt people into working with you, if you’re trying to
make something happen in the first minute of the conversation, you don’t have
someone’s best interests in mind. Creating a sense of indebtedness and social
pressure to reciprocate doesn’t work anymore.

Instead of trying to make a sale, earn the right to a
relationship.

Begin with some light
stalking. Spend twenty minutes online looking for that one kernel, that one
detail, that triggers a whole character, even a whole world, for your prospect.
Something there’s no possible way you could have known. Then, when you show up
at their office, hold something in your hand that speaks to that.

Help people think
differently. Bring them new ideas. Create and capitalize on the
content others neglect. Find value in the discarded, see things nobody else can
see, then paint a picture that changes everything. Then, when you sit
down with people, the ideas you share will equip them to spot a new story with
their own eyes.

Actually
start with the customer. Make tangible efforts to be relevant
within their lifestyle. Help people with what they’re already doing instead of
artificially squeezing yourself into their overcrowded lives. Then, when you
call them on the phone, you’ll prove that you care enough to understand their
world.

Be
a stand for their greatness. Put their name up in
lights. Give people a front row seat to their own brilliance. Instead of
sending prospects an article of interest, write a blog post that turns their
company into the article of interest itself, then dedicate to them. Then, when
you send them an email, the subject line will edify their genius.

Focus on that, and the sale will make itself.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…

Are you trying to make a sale or earn the right to a
relationship?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…

For the list called, “5 Creative Ways to Approach the Sale,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!

* * * *

Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Writing, Publishing, Performing, Consulting

[email protected]

Yes, I do more than just wear a nametag all day.

My enterprise is actually quite robust. I add value to my clients in several cool ways.

Explore the myriad ways you, your people and your organization can leverage my talents.

The Wow Gap

Wow is the distance between expectation and experience.

And the bigger we make that gap, the
bigger impact we have.

In the service world, when our interactions are over the top
for no good reason, when we deliver so much wow that clients have no choice but
to tell their friends, people love us forever. Even if it’s as simple as
sending a text message to someone who took the time to reach out, our immediate
response can overwhelm someone to the point of shock.

I recently commissioned an illustrator named Jose to do a
series of nametag cartoons for me. Considering I was only paying him five bucks apiece,
I didn’t expect much. History taught me that we get what we pay for.

Except for when we don’t.

The work Jose delivered was so unbelievable, so unexpected –
and so criminally inexpensive when you consider the gap between experience and
expectation – I not only showed his work to everyone I know, not only hired him
for a series of future projects, but I also sent him a substantial gratuity
check.

Wow.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…

Are you growing the gap between expectation and experience?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…

For the list called, “14 Things You Don’t Have to Do Anymore,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!

* * * *

Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Writing, Publishing, Performing, Consulting

[email protected]

Yes, I do more than just wear a nametag all day.

My enterprise is actually quite robust. I add value to my clients in several cool ways.

Explore the myriad ways you, your people and your organization can leverage my talents.

How Do I Break Someone’s Heart Without Feeling Like An Asshole?

There’s nothing more painful than knowing you have to break
someone’s heart.

Whether it’s the end of a relationship, the termination of
an employee, the delivery of a verdict, the cutting of a player, the dismissing
of a volunteer, the rejection of a candidate, the reporting of a diagnosis or
the conveyance of bad news, at some point in life, we all have to put on a pair
of heartbreaker’s shoes.

I’ve done it a few times before. Both right and wrong, both
coldly and compassionately, both personally and professionally. And I learned
that I could insure myself from the devastating guilt and self-torture that
accompanies the process of severance if I asked (and kept asking) one question:

How will I need to
feel when this is done to still be okay with myself?

That’s the filter. That’s what I need to answer before
delivering the death stroke.

Otherwise it will be very hard to sleep that night.

Years ago, I reached a point in a relationship where I knew
I had to end it. I couldn’t take it any longer. My stomach was tied in knots,
and I knew that if I waited another day, terrible things would happen. Plus the dog was seriously onto me.

And in the eleventh hour, I remember sitting in my car, clutching
the wheel like a life preserver, refusing to go upstairs and end my broken
relationship. At that point, no matter what I said, it would break her
heart. No matter what I said, she would hate me for it. And there was nothing I
could do to change that.

But I also knew that I could live with myself if I communicated
in a way that was kind, honest and clear. Those were my parameters. Kind, honest and clear. Do that, and you’re not an asshole.

Ten minutes later, I dragged myself out of the garage,
walked upstairs, took a few deep breaths and dropped the biggest bomb of my
life. I told her it was over.

Then she vomited for twenty minutes.

It was the lowest moment of my life. Sitting on the floor of
the bathroom, rubbing her shoulder, pretending to cry, wondering how long I was
supposed to fake it until she took the dog and walked out the door. Horrible, horrible.

But there was nothing left to say. The bomb had dropped, the
bell had rung and the relationship was dead.

As soon as her car was out of sight, I immediately called my
best friend and said, “I need you to tell me that I’m not an asshole.”

You’re not, he
said.

I thanked him, hung up and passed out.

Slept like a log that night. Ten straight hours. No dreams.

And when I woke up, part of me wondered if I should have
felt more devastated, more disturbed, busy counting dots on the ceiling,
tossing and turning until the sun came up.

But then I remembered the promise I made to myself: Kind,
honest and clear. That’s how I needed to feel when this was done to still be
okay with myself. And I did. I made the right decision.

The point is, the only person you’re truly with forever is
yourself. And if you can’t go to sleep feeling content with that person, you’re
in trouble.

If you have to break someone’s heart, ask yourself how you need to feel when it’s over to still be okay with yourself.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…

Whose heart do you need to break?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…

Ask yourself,”How will I need to
feel when this is done to still be okay with myself?” and then go do it.

* * * *

Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Writing, Publishing, Performing, Consulting

[email protected]

Yes, I do more than just wear a nametag all day.

My enterprise is actually quite robust. I add value to my clients in several cool ways.

Explore the myriad ways you, your people and your organization can leverage my talents.

The Nametag Guy Live: Are You The Answer?

LET ME ASK YA THIS…

What are you the answer to?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…

For the list called, “62 Types of Questions and Why They Work,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!

* * * *

Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Writing, Publishing, Performing, Consulting

[email protected]

Never the same speech twice. Customized for your audience. Impossible to walk away uninspired.

Now booking for 2012-2013.

Watch clips of The Nametag Guy in action here!

NametagTV: Responses That Matter

Not everyone is looking for an answer.

When people turn to you, sometimes all they want is a response.

Here’s the difference:

When you give answers, you fix.
When you give answers, you offer advice.
When you give answers, you try to be right.
When you give answers, you add unnecessary value.
When you give answers, you dominate the discussion.
When you give answers, you impose your own direction.
When you give answers, you rob people of the learning experience.

IN SHORT: You speak from a place of information.

But.

When you offer responses, you dance in the moment.
When you offer responses, you acknowledge their truth.
When you offer responses, you leave people feeling heard.
When you offer responses, you practice emotional restraint.
When you offer responses, you let people learn things on their own.
When you offer responses, you reflect people’s immediate experience.
When you offer responses, you get out of the way and give people space to process.

IN SHORT: You speak from a place of affirmation.

Here are a few ways to respond – not answer – someone who turns to you:1. Respond with reflection. I once dated a woman who was undergoing a career transition. One afternoon while complaining about her idiot boss, I defaulted to coach mode and starting dispensing answers. Huge mistake. She interrupted and exclaimed, “I don’t need you to help me – I need you to bitch with me.”

So I did. We had a bitchfest. And admittedly, it was kind of fun. Almost like a game of improv. Point being, even if complaining isn’t your preferred method for dealing with problems, if it’s the response people need most, you have to honor that request. Otherwise your desire to fix, be right and look smart becomes a barrier to being helpful. Are you a human mirror?

2. Respond with nothing. Don’t turn from silence – it’s the gateway through which life’s most profound insights enter. Next time someone comes to you, be careful not to talk just for the sake of talking. Sometimes the best thing you can say is nothing at all. Sometimes the best response is to hold someone’s hand, look at her with compassionate eyes and remind her that she’s not alone.

In that moment, silence serves as a permission slip. It creates the space people need to slow down, process their thoughts and examine the nuances of the story they’re telling. Are you willing to accept silence as a normal, healthy part of your conversations?

3. Respond with wow. Not saying the wrong thing at the wrong time is equally as important as saying the right thing at the right time. Especially in highly emotional situations, the last thing you want is to make the other person think, “You’re not helping.”

Instead of dispensing bumper sticker platitudes, rote responses, disrespectful minimizers, empty promises or false empathy, just say, “Wow.” It’s the most versatile word in the English language. It acknowledges people’s emotions. And it buys you time to think of what to say next. Are you short-circuiting people’s emotional realities?

4. Respond with questions. Some questions aren’t questions – they’re matches. And often times, that’s what people really need: Someone to infect them with just enough fuel to uncover their own answers. Someone to pump up the volume of the voice they most want to be quiet. And someone to help them connect the dots, see beyond what is, and feel a greater sense of self-achievement.

Just be sure not to ask too many questions. Otherwise you’ll override people’s mental motherboards and smoke will start coming out of their heads. Next time someone turns to you, don’t overlook the value of asking one disturbing question – and shutting up. Are you a question mark?

5. Respond with paper. Taking notes respects people’s thoughts. It shows them their words have weight. And it honors the profound human longing to be seen and feel heard. What’s more, it’s the most expressive, honest and organized way to respond to someone without dispensing advice. Especially if you physically hand someone your notes after a few minutes of listening.

Let them see their own words reflected back to them. It’s an affirmation, confirmation and validation of their personal truth. Because paper doesn’t lie. Plus, now you have a record of the conversation just in case a person does. What did you write today?

REMEMBER: Just because you’re a good listener doesn’t you leave people heard.

Next time someone turns to you, try offering a response.

Because not everyone wants an answer.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
Can you practice enough emotional restraint to respond instead of answer?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For a list called, “7 Ways to Out Experience the Competition,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Entrepreneur, Mentor
[email protected]

Sick of selling?
Tired of cold calling?
Bored with traditional prospecting approaches?

Buy Scott’s book and learn how to ~~sell~~ enable people to buy!

Pick up your copy (or a case!) right here.

Help Scott Ginsberg Write “The Nametag Manifesto” On ChangeThis.com

After 4000+ days, I am convinced the societal implications of everybody wearing nametags could change our world forever.

I’ve written my official manifesto, and to publish it, I need your vote.

It takes ten seconds. Please help!

Here’s the synopsis:

Everyone should wear nametags. Every day. Everywhere. After eleven years of constant experimentation, research and exploration, Scott Ginsberg, who has worn a nametag for 4,000 consecutive days, believes that the societal implications of nametags will change everything:

Higher intimacy. Greater social belonging. No more human commoditization. No more social conflict. No more untruthfulness. Lower threat level. Higher social captial. The end of incivility.

The end of cultural barriers. The end of disconnectedness. Mass generosity. Deeper mindfulness. Deeper humility. Less formality. Less hierarchy. Less insecurity. Less discrimination. And of course, no more anonymity.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What would happen if we all wore nametags?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For the list called, “14 Things You Don’t Have to Do Anymore,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Publisher, Artist, Mentor
[email protected]

Never the same speech twice.

Now booking for 2011-2012!

Watch The Nametag Guy in action here!

The Bridge Between Opportunity and Profitability

Wearing a nametag every day isn’t much of an accomplishment.

Making a successful career out of it, is.

That’s leverage.

Killing two stones with one bird.

And it all pivots on one question:

Now that I have this, what else does this make possible?

That’s not just a question, that’s a catapult. And if you’re willing to adopt leverage as a way of thinking, as a way of living – and not just another downloadable skill – you’ll be amazed at the change you can create.

Leverage is the bridge between opportunity and profitability.

Cross it daily.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What did you leverage this week?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For the list called, “23 Ways to Make Your Fans Super Happy,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Publisher, Artist, Mentor
[email protected]

Never the same speech twice.

Now booking for 2011-2012!

Watch The Nametag Guy in action here!

Why Confidence Threatens People

Wearing a nametag is surprisingly polarizing.

I’ve had people refuse to go out in public with me because of it. I’ve had businesses refuse to let me in the door because of it. I’ve had strangers start fights with me because of it. I’ve had girls break up with me because of it.

Good lord. It’s just a sticker.

Or is it?

Apparently for some people, it’s not a sticker – it’s a social liability.

I know this because they’ve told me this. Their reputation is in danger by association. And standing next to the guy with the nametag is damaging to their image.

“Hey Scott, could you just stand over there for the rest of the night?”It’s a sticker.

Or is it?

My theory is, it’s not that people have a problem with the nametag – it’s that people have a problem being around someone who is okay with himself.

Confidence threatens people. Especially insecure people.

And I think it’s our job, as human beings, to view each others’ self-assurance not as a liability, but as an inspiration.

If we encounter someone who puts unadulterated self-belief at the apex of their value system – that’s a gift.

And we need to be confident enough to receive it.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What’s your nametag?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For a list called, “7 Ways to Out Experience the Competition,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Entrepreneur, Mentor
[email protected]

Sick of selling?
Tired of cold calling?
Bored with traditional prospecting approaches?

Buy Scott’s book and learn how to ~~sell~~ enable people to buy!

Pick up your copy (or a case!) right here.

Where Poor Customer Service Comes From

It’s amazing.

Considering how much time, money and effort companies spend on customer service training; we’re never really taught to become better customers ourselves.

Because in most of the day’s transactions, we’re the customers – not the servers.

But if we truly want to have a joyful, remarkable experience, we can’t just sit back and wait for people to read our minds and make us happy.

We have to help them help us. As guests, patients, viewers, clients, patrons, members, visitors, users, callers, listeners and customers, we have to make ourselves more servable.

Otherwise we’re equally at fault for not getting what we want, the way we want it.It starts with expectational clarity. Sharing what’s important to us. Letting people in on our preferences. And delivering a vision of what happiness looks like.

Take a massage studio. If we don’t want the therapist yapping our ear off during the entire session, we need to speak up and let her know that silence is essential to our relaxation. Otherwise we end up getting mad at her for being chatty and ruining the experience, when all we had to do was take two seconds to say, “Oh, and I prefer to keep quiet most of the time.”

Being a better customer also has to with vocalizing dissatisfaction. Letting those who serve us know that we’re not happy with the exchange. Unfortunately, this is harder than it sounds because, as humans, we dread confrontation. We avoid conflict. And we don’t want to be difficult.

We’d rather suck it up and eat the overcooked steak instead of making a fuss, sending it back and risk being the topic of conversation in the kitchen.

Because nobody wants to be the freak at the table.

The problem is, this kind of passivity hurts both parties.

It hurts the server because he misses out on valuable feedback from his customer. Our silence robs him of the opportunity to create a service moment and a story worth repeating.

But it also hurts us. It reduces our experience. We get annoyed that an employee missed the mark, and we selfishly assume it’s because he’s an incompetent dolt who doesn’t listen to his customers.

When in reality, the real reason we’re so unhappy is because we made that employee do unnecessary guesswork.

We never helped them help us.

We just sat there, winking in the dark, hoping they would read our minds.

And unless we’re getting our palm read, that’s not the smartest path to happiness.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
Are you a good customer?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For the list called, “58 Questions about Questions” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Publisher, Artist, Mentor
[email protected]

Never the same speech twice.

Now booking for 2011-2012!

Watch The Nametag Guy in action here!

When a Nametag Isn’t a Nametag

“I could never wear a nametag everyday!”

That’s what people tell me.

And I believe them.

The only thing is, they already do. We all do. Each one of us wears a nametag every day of our lives.

It’s just not always in the form of a sticker.Remember, it’s not a nametag:

It’s an opening, an opportunity, an invitation, a gesture, a declaration, a conversation, an acknowledgment, an act, a brand, a commitment, a contact, an engagement, an equalizer, an experiment, a filter, a generosity, an identity, an introduction, a label, a message, a mystery, a namesake, a permission slip, a personalization, a reputation, a socialization, a surprise, a vulnerability, a weapon and an advertisement.

What is it – that you do – that is all of those things?

That’s your nametag.

Instead of asking why you should wear it, ask what’s already written on it.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What’s your nametag?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For a list called, “7 Ways to Out Experience the Competition,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!

* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Entrepreneur, Mentor
[email protected]

Sick of selling?
Tired of cold calling?
Bored with traditional prospecting approaches?

Buy Scott’s book and learn how to ~~sell~~ enable people to buy!

Pick up your copy (or a case!) right here.

Sign up for daily updates