Dropping a precision f strike

Do you want to get out of your own way?

Here’s an emotional linguistic hack that will change your life.

Learn to replace the phrase, fuck you, with the phrase, okay, sounds great.

It’s just an easier existence. You save yourself and everyone else a heaping ton of stress, conflict and complication.

Now, understandably, those two words are difficult to resist. Saying fuck you to someone is a classic expression of strong disgust and anger. We use it as a vulgar insult to express our contempt. It’s the perfect comeback for wishing misfortune upon another. Cathartic and dramatic and empowering, what’s not to like?

And it’s oddly personal. Brandishing a fuck you typically comes with an implied emotional investment in the interaction. Like the movies where the character delivers what’s known in the screen writing world as the precision f strike.

This trope is when the antagonist suddenly swears in an uncharacteristically strong manner. It’s a record scratch moment.

Once someone drop the big one, the queen mother of dirty words, the f dash dash dash word, it’s usually intended to show that shit just got real. Things just got serious. Conflict escalated to threat level orange. Prepare your weapons.

Point being, every time you feel those two satisfying words welling up inside your throat, threatening to spill out, remember that you’re not in a movie. And train yourself to counter them with the words, okay, sounds great.

Let’s explore three reasons why this is an easier existence.

First and foremost, they’re fundamentally positive words. Nothing shapes our thoughts, emotions and interactions better than positivity. When we take control of the frame in which we communicate with ourselves and each other, growth, progress and connection happen as a matter of course.

They transform our interactions to create a more harmonious environment.

The second reason to swap out the two phrases is, fuck you is essentially an ego driven behavior. We say it when the part of ourselves that seeks validation, dominance and control, feels threatened.

How dare my husband ask me to do that? Who does he think I am, his mistress and maid?

That kind of comment could only come from a place of ego. And such a reaction typically hinders personal growth and damage relationships.

Now, this doesn’t give anyone permission to treat us cruelly. We can and should stand up to abuse. If our spouse demands we perform sickening sexual acts that are painful, risky and demeaning, and those behaviors are violations of our boundaries and not part of our arousal constellation, then sure, saying fuck you is in order.

But we can also wonder to ourselves. Is this person that I cherish really being mean to me, is it just my own shit rising to the surface?

Reason number three behind this linguistic shift is, it diffuses conflict and fosters understanding.

What’s fascinating about changing our language from fuck you to okay, sounds good, is that it forces empathy. It shifts the tone from confrontational to more open and receptive, allowing everyone to approach the situation with a calmer mindset.

Ultimately, job number one as human beings is to foster positive and supportive relationships. With ourselves, with each other, and with the world.

Saying fuck you feels great, and there’s a time and place for it. We shouldn’t suppress our feelings or avoid conflicts altogether.

But the beauty of this linguistic hack is, it creates an alternate route. One that opens up the possibility for things like collaboration, compromise and problem solving.

As a final meditation, let’s think of it as an allegory.

Once upon a time, in a land far away, there were two paths that people could choose to embark upon in their daily interactions and relationships.

Each path represented a different approach to communication and had a profound impact on their lives.

The first path was called the fuck you path. The treacherous and thorny road was full of anger, hostility, and bitterness. Those who walked this path let their egos take control, allowing their emotions to overwhelm them. This path led to strained relationships, shattered trust, and a constant state of turmoil.

The second path was called the okay, sounds great path. It was serene, adorned with vibrant flowers, a gentle breeze and friendly woodland creatures. Those who walked this path learned the power of positive language and emotional intelligence. They responded to friends and family with empathy, respect, and a willingness to find common ground.

Who took which path? How did their stories turn out?

Charles, our first character, clung desperately to the fuck you path, and a grotesque fate awaited him. As he walked, a horrifying cycle of conflict and isolation gnawed at his sanity, leaving his minds shredded and his heart coated in a thick, gelatinous despair.

His anger, a festering maelstrom of negativity, oozed from his pores, repelling even the most resilient of souls. Loved ones turned away, repulsed by the venomous tendrils that snaked from his mouths.

Charles ultimately became a pariah adrift in a desolate wasteland of his own creation.

Mira, our other character, embraced the wondrous okay sounds great path.

She was immediately bestowed with celestial rewards. As time gracefully danced upon her life, relationships bloomed with the fragrant blossoms of trust, love, and a harmonious symphony of mutual respect.

She became the radiant center of a heavenly gathering, surrounded by friends enraptured by the shimmering aura of her positive communication.

Her partner in the sacred union of matrimony stood in awe, mesmerized by her alchemical prowess to transmute tension into delicate tendrils of serenity.

Which path will you walk? Will you get out of your own way and learn to let things go?

Or will ego run the show?

Whatever choice you make, let me be the first to say, okay, sounds great.

Do you need to drop a precision f strike, or say something less dramatic?