Curious in why we react to life as we do

Compassion isn’t just a sentimental idea, it’s a survival tool.

Especially when directed within. Our willingness and ability to be sensitive to our own distress builds an innate resilience that keeps us on balance and moving forward.

That’s why compassion is now being taught in elementary schools alongside reading, writing and arithmetic. It’s a force multiplier. It’s the capability that significantly enhances the probability of success.

Gilbert actually discovered in his research on the compassionate mind that the kinder and more compassionate we are with ourselves, the more we can develop the courage to tolerate difficult things.

That’s one hell of a persuasive argument for learning to love ourselves. Who knew that being sensitive to ourselves during times of struggle could actually help us survive them? Who knew that weathering our many personal storms could be made dramatically easier by seeing our experiences as normal and not personal and part of the human condition?

Turns out, sending ourselves helpful messages when things are hard for us is the first step to healing.

And to me, the key is merging our compassion with curiosity. Not sitting up all night in our beds googling insomnia symptoms in the hopes of learning why we haven’t slept in six days. That’s not curiosity, that’s just rumination. Misdirected imagination that keeps our minds turned towards our suffering and probably makes things worse.

The real practice is learning to be curious and interested in why we react to life as we do.

Listening to body and spirit to uncover what our current experience of suffering might be trying to teach us. Reflecting on what aspects of our circumstances might be view as a gift to be treasured.

One question that’s helpful to ask is:

Right here, right now, what is the primary cause of my own suffering?

Honestly confronting what might really bothering us, lovingly accepting whatever answers surface, and curiously exploring where those things might have originated.

It may be sentimental, but it’s also strategic. And when you’re in a world of pain, you’ll take any strategy you can get.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What if genuine sympathy for your own distress and a gentleness towards your own needs was an untapped resource for building resilience?