Your television is killing your sex life

Starting with why is a fine idea. But what about starting with who? As in, who you are? If it's true that you are the most important person in your life, then it stands to reason that your true self should be the baseline from which all actions are taken. Because when you know who you are, every moment isn’t a moral challenge, it’s just a checklist. Motivation is neither here nor there. Choices are easier, interactions are warmer, relationships...

Everybody want everything both ways. It’s the law of unreasonable incompatibility. Westerners use the idiom, you want to have their cake and eat it too. But this principle has its own quirky expression in just about every culture. Albania says, to take a swim and not get wet. Bulgaria says, to have the wolf fed and the lamb in tact. Italy says, to keep the barrel of wine with a drunk wife. Korea says, to chase two rabbits at the...

Decisiveness is a universal quality of successful people. The ability to make choices quickly and confidently, and not hastily and arrogantly, is precisely what gives us the ability to take action and move our story forward. However, when it comes to the deeply complicated issue of our identities, making a decision isn’t always necessary or even useful. Because we’re not supposed to be one thing in life. Part of being an evolving human being is accepting our endowment of the...

Some people believe every choice they make is a significant life decision that will have a profound effect on the whole of their existence. The butterfly is forever flapping its wings. Anything could mean everything, and so, each move they make is carefully scripted and manicured. It's not worth doing if it's not worth over thinking first, right? God forbid their choices are not optimized for perfection. The problem with this habit is, despite appearing judicious and strategic in the...

In our world of infinite choice and constant distraction, it’s never been easier to bail on our plans with people. It seems that basic social contracts like setting a date and actually showing up on time have become a scarce commodity. Technology and psychology theorists blame this trend on a number of sources, some under our control and some not. But why people flake out doesn’t concern me as much as what people can to do reverse this trend. Because...