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Stress doesn’t kill us, our reaction to it does. We suffer because we let other people’s emergencies become our crisis. And not to be uncompassionate to their struggle. Everybody hurts, to quote the classic nineties song, but at some point, we have to set a boundary, so their stuff doesn’t become ours. Otherwise we’ll drench our nervous system with a cocktail of frustration and pay the price long after…

More and more hospitals and health clinics are practicing something called whole person care. If you’re like me and you read medical journals from the national institute of health for fun, you will notice that healthcare professionals are trained to practice several things. See the person as a whole and in the context of his or her family and wider social environment. Take continuity of responsibility for people’s care across many…

When we start using words like always and never, that means our brain is messing with us. Even if it is comforting in the moment to have something black and white to hang our hats on, engaging in these all or nothing, now or never demands often make things worse, not better. Phycologists call it dichotomous thinking or cognitive distortions. And the danger is, our overreactions in response to…

The hard part about anxiety is accepting it as a condition you actually have. Because nobody likes hearing they have something. Or that there’s a clinical label to apply to their brain. Especially if society stigmatizes that label. Anxiety, depression, panic, mania? Nope, those are conditions that other people suffer from, not me. Meanwhile, some medical professionals won’t push acceptance as a requirement for treatment. While skimming through a…

Feeling betrayed is a painful and difficult emotional state. When somebody breaks or violates the contract we both agreed upon, we have every right to be upset, and they should absolutely apologize for their callousness. But at the same time, we must be careful not to overdramatize this idea. Because it’s easy to confuse betrayal with things like disappointment, disagreement, change or compromise. Take the music fan who feels…

“I heard the reviews were bad.” The moment somebody makes that statement, my desire to continue the conversation will evaporate. First of all, you didn’t read the review, you heard a review of the review. Secondly, all reviews, whether from real customers or professional critics, are never an accurate reflection of objective quality of the product. It’s like those people who ask their waitresses for a recommendation of what…

After two years at my first job, the time came to submit my letter of resignation to management. The founders read it and asked me to stand up and make a quick announcement to the team about leaving. People stopped what they were doing, looked up from their computers, listened attentively to my few words of gratitude and farewell, nodded their heads, and immediately went back to work. No…

The COVID19 pandemic has disrupted all of our lives. But sometimes disruptions can be times of opportunity. Many people’s livelihoods have been hurt by the pandemic. Some saw this as an opportune time to take their lives in a new direction. Authority Magazine launched a series call “How I Was Able To Pivot To A New Exciting Opportunity Because Of The Pandemic”, I had the pleasure of being featured…

Satisfaction, like most things in this life, is an inside job. Contrary to popular conditioning, and despite what the marketing powers that be would have us believe, deciding to feel content comes from the interior space. It doesn’t depend on having things work out our way, it has nothing to do with how people react to us, and it isn’t related to some external achievement or acquisition that, once…

My favorite maxim around the subject of habits comes from a widely successful television executive. He’s been sober his entire life, and when asked what prompted that decision, here’s what he told the interviewer: You never want to start something other people are trying to quit. This might be the most lucid, logical and elegant life philosophy ever stated. And yet, most people don’t think that way when it…