Blog

We can come boldly to the throne of grace and find mercy in our time of need. Preachers use this verse in sermons as an invitation to approach god with confidence, but we don’t necessarily have to involve the big man upstairs to gain value from scripture. I see this verse as a reminder of the importance of being accountable to our own needs. Rather than codependently hiding behind…

Let’s talk about the things we hide behind. There are so many ways to avoid being seen, noticed or interacted with in this world. And each tactic is more fascinating and seductive than the next. That’s human nature for you. We’re all expert at using things to protect ourselves from criticism, punishment and vulnerability. We have been conditioned to quell many of our top fears, like the fear of…

Consider the corporate executive early bird. Someone whose performance and alertness are in their best conditions before the sun comes up. When none of his employees or customers need his attention yet. At five in the morning, that guy should not be checking email, reading the news, or doom scrolling on social media. The executive should only focus on high concentration activities like crunching numbers, critical thinking, strategic planning,…

In theory, humans exhibit greater productive early in the morning because their brains are rested, which means they’re naturally more alert and energized. Their motivation is high during this quiet and calm time, as people are less distracted and happier. They’re more likely to anticipate problems and minimize them efficiently, as they’re not waiting around to be told what to do or how to handle things. Finally, there is…

I was reading a neuroscience study about how certain people are genetically predisposed to respond more strongly to unfairness than others. It’s called equity sensitivity. The degree to which people have a strong, automatic reaction when they encounter a situation that’s unfair. And it’s funny, because if you read some of the questions on the assessment tool, they’re fundamentally flawed. The language perpetuates a mindset of constant comparison and…

In my late thirties, I got laid off four times from four jobs, back to back to back to back. The first one was a workforce reduction, the second was an acquisition, the third was a private equity buyout, and the fourth was a prefundraising downsizing. Naturally, I felt sad, lonely, confused, angry, rejected and unappreciated. This was textbook unfairness. Because I knew in my heart that I did…

The problem is not that life is unfair, but that fairness doesn’t exist. Look around. We live in an unjust society, not in a world with impartial and just treatment without favoritism or discrimination. Being a human means accepting that the scales of justice don’t balance simply because we expect them to. In fact, I find that the more hung up people get on how the world should work,…

I want to break down three dimensions of intellectual humility. For each one, I offer suggestions for raising awareness of your cognitive fallibility. The first piece of intellectual humility is independence of intellect and ego. This refers to our ability to separate our beliefs and opinions from our sense of worthiness. We accept and evaluate ideas and information objectively, without letting personal emotions cloud our judgment. This one is…

Aristotle said it is the mark of an educated mind to entertain an idea without accepting it. This is the habit of what psychologists call intellectual humility. It’s the awareness of our own cognitive shortcomings. Recent research has shown this trait is correlated with improved wellbeing, stronger relationships, lower stress and greater resilience. Here’s a quote a from a study in a positive psychology journal that resonated with me….

That which is no longer directly perceived, ceases to exist. Not literally, of course. But the way the human brain works is, it quickly forgets things that are no longer visible or present. If we can’t see it, it’s not there. Psychologists would call this a lack of object permanence. And the principle primarily applies to infants playing peekaboo, although interesting to consider its adult implications. Because oftentimes, a…