Balanced depth, broadly rooted

Stay away from the extremes.

Avoid having only one center of gravity, but also make sure you don’t have too many.

In the case of the former, it’s unwise it is to turn a single entity into the center of gravity of your universe. Dependency on a single source for your identity can be risky when that aspect of life inevitably changes or diminishes.

Think of it this way.

Have you ever had only one friend? Or worse yet, have you ever been someone else’s only friend?

This is a vulnerable position to be in. It can be quite the emotional burden and create an unhealthy dependency on a single person.

Think about this use case in terms of physics. Gravity is the fundamental force that attracts objects with mass towards each other. And the strength of the gravitational force depends on the masses of the objects and the distance between them.

Now, if each individual in the relationship represents a mass in this metaphorical system, then the gravitational force between the two friends is analogous to the strength of their friendship and the level of emotional connection they share.

Meaning, if you have multiple friends, now the gravitational force between each pair is distributed among them, creating a more balanced social dynamic. Whereas, if it’s just you and this other person, not only can the emotional weight of your friendship be overwhelming, but what happens when someone moves? Or gets married and has kids? Or goes through a twelve step recovery program and completely one eighties their life?

Then who are you supposed to call?

Multiple centers of gravity provide a buffer and can help maintain a sense of purpose and stability during difficult times. Distributing your time and energy across different aspects of life promotes balance and prevents burnout.

On the other end of the spectrum, having too many centers of gravity throws off your equilibrium. Competing entities disrupt the balance of the system. Objects aren’t able to remain at rest or maintain a consistent motion, and chaos ensues.

This means that changing your position, direction and speed at moment’s notice will be difficult.

For example, have you ever heard the phase, a mile wide and an inch deep? What about the opposite, a mile deep and an inch wide? Both of these are illustrations go to the extreme, and they’re not particularly helpful.

Whereas a healthier approach would be to view your life as, balanced depth, broadly rooted. That’s a good gravitational middle ground.

As an example, creativity has always been my center of gravity. I enjoy a range of media and projects, from authoring books to composing music to playing concerts to giving speeches to making films to building software.

Now, that might sound to you like an overwhelming amount of creative irons in the fire. Maybe even a lack of focus. But it’s quite the opposite, since all of those projects are interconnected. They’re merely different renderings of the same sentiments.

When I write a chapter in my new book on, say, the absurdity of life, those thousand words might become source material for a song, which I will perform in public and later record on a full length album, or ultimately use as the score for my latest movie.

Balanced depth, broadly rooted.

Each project is not its own additional center of gravity, but an object adding greater overall gravity to the existing mass.

Ultimately, gravity is a powerful force, and if we understand its physical and existential implications, we give ourselves a real shot at fulfillment.

How much does your life weigh?