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Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
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Never the same speech twice.
Always about approachability.
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Few forces in the world burn brighter than a human being’s inherent hunger to contribute.
However, contrary to what Al Gore says, making your mark in the world doesn’t have to mean leaving carbon footprints.
What it does mean is getting off your ass, getting into the game and cementing your legacy.
That way, you can leave this cosmic campsite better than you found it.
To do so, consider this list of attitudes, behaviors and action items to help you make a mark that matters:1. Smoke a peace with why you are. During a recent workshop with a group of student leaders, I was asked if I knew what I was doing when I started my business right out of college. “Hell no,” I told them, “In fact, I still don’t know what I’m doing – I just have a deeper sense of why I’m doing it.”
Lesson learned: Making your mark means not being stopped by not knowing how. Instead, commit to a consistency of why. The how will come in time. Promise. After all, that’s what people really want to know about their leaders: Not just how they are, not just who they are – but why they are.
That’s the verb that matters. That’s how you fulfill your function. That’s how you put a check mark next to your divine assignment. And if you betray the mission you were mandated to fulfill, you commit a form of spiritual suicide.
Look: I know how hard it is to surrender to something larger. You feel vulnerable, uncertain and out of control.
And while I don’t preach the predominance of any particular supernatural agency, there is always value in making peace with something that’s big enough to crush you like a walnut. It’s an essential step for building faith, instilling the proper humility and trusting your higher resources.
Plus, chicks dig it.
Remember: The best way to leave ineradicable imprints on the world is to live a life that makes an unmistakable statement about what you believe. Have you subordinated yourself to something larger than yourself?
2. Open yourself to life. Stop winking in the dark. The world is way too beautiful to waste time hiding. Or sleeping. Or watching television. Instead, stick yourself out there. Every damn day.
Now, odds are good that when you do so, there will be a growing chorus of voices trying to sway you. And your paralyzing fear of criticism might prevent you from acting decisively.
My suggestion is to stop listening and start choosing. Take you finger off your chin and press the buttons that activate the nitrous tanks. Otherwise the only mark you’ll make is the perpetual ass print on your couch.
Remember: It’s impossible to make a make your mark without taking a step. Even if it’s a step in the wrong direction, at least you’re still stepping.
Sure beats sitting on the couch all night, eating Triscuits and stalking your ex-girlfriend on Facebook. Who’s that loser she’s dating now anyway? Do you remember the last time you traveled without plans?
3. Build a physical space to explore your imagination. Time recently ran a fascinating profile on Thomas Edison’s workspace. They explored the physical components to his laboratory, from lighting to furniture to architecture to staffing policies.
According to the story, Edison’s workspace was among his greatest assets. That’s one of the reasons he was able to pound out 1,093 patents in his lifetime, many of which marked the world in ways he never could have imagined.
Lesson learned: Structureless environments paralyze. Structure allows growth. And the impact of your ideas is directly proportionate to how organized the space is that surrounds it. If you want to make your mark, begin by preserving the sanctity of your workspace.
Not an office – a workspace. Call it an office and slice your creativity in half. Call it a workspace – a factory of creativity – and you execute ideas that matter. Is your content as brilliant as the system that manages it?
4. Invite people to have bigger conversations. Spending four hours arguing which contestant on The Biggest Loser deserves to win is not going to help you make a mark that matters. If truly want to create lasting change, you have to get people talking about bigger things.
Scott Adams recently wrote about this very topic on his widely ready blog. “Arguably, the most important function of human language is to protect the smart from the strong,” says the Dilbert creator.
“Humans use words to create sentences, and sentences to create concepts, such as our notions of duty and honor. Powerful concepts control behavior. And without our language and concepts, the strong would kill the smart, and humans wouldn’t evolve to be any smarter. I think you could say that human evolution is being guided at least partly by the power of ideas.”
Lesson learned: Elevate the dialogue. Next time somebody asks you what your favorite reality show is; respectfully ask them if you can shift the conversation to a topic that counts before you club them in the head with a fire extinguisher. That way you’ll definitely make your mark. Are your conversations laboratories?
5. Shrink not from hardship. First, stop deluding yourself that you can outsmart getting hurt – you can’t. Stop believing that you can build immunity against life’s sorrows – you can’t. And stop thinking you’re superior to the wounds and upsets of life. I’ve tried all three, and none accomplished anything but exacerbating my misery.
Secondly, remember that you can breathe through most pain, decapitations notwithstanding. Oxygen is the new Tylenol, and with a healthier relationship with your breath, you will be floored at how much of the impact your lungs can displace.
Third, pain is an invitation to excel and a deliverer of wisdom. Consider making friends with it instead of trying to eradicate it. You’ll discover that pain is like that weird guy you went to college with.
You know the one: He turned out to be a really cool, interesting, fun guy – but only after you set aside your judgments and gave his voice a chance to be heard.
Finally, pain is a natural part of the human experience. It makes you feel alive. But if you’re the kind of person who lives a trouble-free life, you’re not actually living – you just exist. And it’s pretty hard to make a mark from such a dormant posture.
Ultimately, Parker Palmer said it best in A Hidden Wholeness: “Don’t become alienated from your truth. Feel it, name it – but don’t numb it. The pain will crack the closed system open and force you out from behind the wall toward healing.” Remember: Pain is part of the equation. Where have you gotten hurt this week?
REMEMBER: You’re not too boring to contribute something worthwhile.
If you truly want to make a mark in the world – you, alone, are responsible for movement.
As we wrap things up, let’s turn to Indecision, who sings in the song To Live and Die in New York City:
“To make your mark is to die face up on flaming asphalt while your corpse speaks for itself.”
Take that, Al Gore.
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Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Entrepreneur, Mentor
[email protected]
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This year, I celebrated my thirtieth birthday.
But instead of spiraling into the typical self-loathing, woe-is-me, I’m-not-satisfied-what-I’ve-accomplished-in-my-life-so-far pity party that most thirty-year olds resign to, I made a choice:
I’m not turning thirty – I’m upgrading to the 3.0 version of myself.
Pretty cool concept. I don’t know where I came up it, but here’s what it means:
Commemorating a major life change.
Staying in stride with upward, progressive movement.
Surrendering to the next phase of your personal evolution.
Letting go of the person you were in order to grow into the person you needed to be.
So far, it’s been an enlightening, complex and exciting journey. And although it’s not over yet, I’ve learned a few cool lessons I’d like to share with you – each of which support the following thesis:
Those who upgrade, win.
It shatters complacency.
It invites opportunity.
It enables victory.
Plus, chicks dig it.
Whether you’re an individual, a corporation, an organization or global micro-brand, consider these strategies for upgrading to the next version of yourself:1. Constantly question your own value. As my friend Rebel Brown explained in Defying Gravity, “If we have a faulty assumption, we have a faulty derivative. And when that derivative is used to create even more derivative numbers, the impact of that single wrong assumption multiplies geometrically.”
And it’s painful to admit, but maybe all this time you were confused between (a) what got you in the door, (b) what brought you to the table, and (c) what kept you in the room.
Because those three things are not the same. And that’s the problem: It’s rare that you define your own value. You’re simply too close to the subject to make an honest, objective assessment.
For that reason, evolving beyond the previous version requires objective feedback. Ideally, from the people who love you enough to tell you how dense and blind you’ve been in the past. This helps create the best possible circumstances in which your growth will be supported, enhanced and fulfilled.
Trust me: Ask them today, or risk remaining the same tomorrow. Have you identified the truly distinct values that will fuel your future momentum?
2. Find evidence of your wrongness. Which isn’t as hard as it sounds. My cousin Collin, a tuberculosis researcher, talks about this phenomenon the time. It’s called confirmation bias, and the simple definition is, “Whatever you’re looking for, you’ll find,” he says.
This is a good thing – it should be easy to find evidence of your wrongness. I challenge you to spend some time asking yourself which of your assumptions might be misguided. Yes, questioning your own logic is probably more confrontational than you’re used to.
But as Rebel Brown reminds me, “Humans have the knack of proving things right when it’s important to them.” Lesson learned: Make it important to you and you will make it right. Or in this case, wrong. How will you beat your own math?
3. Familiar is a form of baggage. Investing in the old version of yourself pays meager dividends. I’ve tried it. The cost of supporting past weight is simply too expensive.
My suggestion: Never forget to focus forward. Save your resources for upgrade-rich activities only. Jettison the drag and employ enough velocity to soar into the next version of yourself. Otherwise, using your past to define your future is like wearing bell-bottoms to an interview for a job on Wall Street.
Eventually, you’ve got to upgrade, or you’ll get creamed every time. Especially if your boss is Michael Douglas. Are you wasting eighty bucks having your old shoes fixed when you could just spend a hundred on a new pair?
4. Grow leaner. Rebel broke this down simply and powerfully in her book: “The bigger we get the slower we are to respond. We carry more weight, making it even harder to change course. And we view change as a disturbance in our carefully laid plan rather than as an opportunity for high-velocity growth.”
Maybe that’s the secret to upgrading: Having less so you can be more. After all, big isn’t necessarily better. In the words of raconteur Henry Rollins, “Life is a process of learning what you can live without.”
Which means: You have to destroy who you were to become who you need to be. Which means: Throttling up your growth starts with throwing away your trash. What habits do you need to jump out of to reinvent yourself?
5. Rewrite your definition of victory. When you start out as a writer, you just want to be read. And liked. And talked about. And maybe paid.
Then, after a few years, things change: Now you just want to be taken seriously. And trusted. And not just read widely – but heard deeply. And maybe paid a little more.
Eventually, however, once you’ve stabilized your career, moved out of your parents’ basement and figured out how to earn a real living doing what makes your heart sing, you come to the realization that all of the vainglorious crap you used to want was nothing but the preamble to what your soul truly aches for:
To matter. To be essential. To become necessary to the world. To make meaning in the universe. And to serve something bigger by regifting your talents to the masses.
Now, I don’t know what it’s like in your industry, but that’s how it works for me. And I challenge you to think two things: First, how your definition of victory has changed over the years, and second, what new strides you’re going to have to take get there. What does winning look like to you?
6. Destroy yourself to reinvent yourself. “Keep doing what you’re doing and risk staying where you are.” I learned this very early on as a professional speaker. Because you can’t keep telling the same stories. You can’t keep using the same material.
Otherwise you bore people. Worse yet, you bore yourself. And that’s when you know you’re really in trouble. I’ve actually done that before, and let me tell ya, there is nothing more existentially agonizing that growing tired of your own act.
Lesson learned: If you don’t obsolete your own stuff, you risk allowing someone else to do it for you. Which means you become obsolete too. On the other hand, if you make your own material obsolete, at least you’re still you. Thank God.
My suggestion: Look at what you’re doing today, think about how you can destroy all of that to create a new you and watch the previous version of yourself melt like a snowball in the sun. What are you afraid to let go of?
7. Creative destruction is a necessary and courageous strategy. You know all those earthquakes, tsunamis, floods and mudslides? Not an accident. And it’s not the fault of the New Orleans sinners living a life of homosexual transgression.
It’s just nature being nature. It’s just nature doing what she’s done for billions of years: Devastating her own landscape. Why? Because devastation stimulates new growth. Not only in nature – but in business and in life.
The problem is, most people choose not to creative destroy themselves. Partly because of complacency. Partly because of ego. And partly because of assuredness. People think, “I’m sure that what I’m doing is the right path, so why keep looking?”
That’s the irony: If you don’t devastate your own landscape regularly, you hold yourself hostage by something that, while it might be working, is limiting your growth.
Try this: Constantly ask yourself questions like, “What will this destroy?” “Will it be worth the risk to destroy this?” and “What can I create that will destroy what I already have that’s successful?”
Ultimately, it all goes back to entropy: If it’s not growing, it’s decaying. Which one do you experience more?
8. Nothing fails like success. Failure is the fun part. I don’t know about you, but if there’s one thing that wakes me up shivering in a cold sweat in the middle of the night wishing I still had my Teddy Ruxpin, it’s success. Blech. Winning? Are you kidding me? Can anyone imagine a more terrifying prospect than getting exactly what you want?
Two examples. First, it’s like the fear of having your books (actually) being read, instead of being ignored. Why does that scare us? Because with great success comes great responsibility. And who the hell wants to deal with that?
Second, the other reason I fear success is because my mentors educated me early on in my career: The arrogance of past victory becomes the aerosol of future failure. As such, you need to recognize that legacies not only jeopardize your growth, but also fuel the gravity that handcuffs you to the past version of yourself that’s not gonna cut it anymore.
Ultimately, complacency is the great growth-destroyer. Avoid it like the clap. Will the next version of you drown in its wake?
9. Discard what doesn’t jive with your future. Upgrading means saying no. Sometimes to good opportunities. Sometimes to great opportunities. But that’s the only way you’re going to invite the best opportunities: By knowing what you don’t want, what doesn’t matter, and who you aren’t.
The challenge is that self-knowledge of this variety doesn’t come easily. It’s a function of your willingness to get very honest with yourself. It’s dependent on your self-control to say no when saying yes would go undetected by the masses.
And it’s reliant on your discipline to ask questions like, “Is this an opportunity or an opportunity to be used?” “Will this contribute to the best, highest version of myself; or create a mediocre future that I’m going to feel obligated to be a part of?”
The equation is simple: Get pickier – grow profitabler. What have you said no to this week?
REMEMBER: Upgrading benefits everybody.
It forces you to drive out complacency.
It enables you to turn the page on the next chapter.
It permits you evolve into the best, highest version of yourself.
Whether you’re a person, company, organization or brand, remember one thing:
Those who upgrade, win.
Sincerely,
Scotty G 3.0
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Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author. Speaker. Mentor. Entrepreneur
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Put away your red cape.
Forget about your alter ego.
And cancel the order on those purple spandex.
Being a hero isn’t what the comic books portray it as.
Here’s the reality:
To live heroically is to consistently commit to (and act from) the best, highest version of yourself – every day.
That’s the real superpower.
Today we’re going to another collection of ideas (read part one!) to help you become a hero to the people who matter:1. Be the example you want followed. There are four ways to influence people: Through your beliefs, through your words, through your actions and through your being.
Now, while all are effective, only the fourth is heroic. Primarily because it’s a form of embodiment, and embodiment is the highest, truest form of communication.
That’s why you can’t just set the example – you have to be the example. A walking translation. A living brochure.
That’s why Martin Luther King was such a hero to so many millions of people: He didn’t just have a dream – he was the dream. What do people think when they hear your life speak?
2. Clarify what support people can count on. The word “hero” comes from the Greek heroe, which means, “defender and protector.” Which doesn’t mean you have to punch out bad guys in back alleys.
But as a hero, it does require that you give people a continuous flow of support in the best way you can. Try these two questions I ask to clarify what kind of help people can count on:
*What’s the best way I can support you?
*How can I help you the most, right now?
Then, once people start to explain their needs, you can tailor your support accordingly. For example:
“Alright, David. Sounds like you need a night out with a friend who will listen. I’m slammed Monday and Tuesday, but you can count on me for either Wednesday or Friday. What works?”
Remember: Clarity evaporates fear. Stay with people. Even when they desert themselves. Are you using a clear, sharp and committed voice to be heard by the people who matter?
3. Courageously break stupid rules. Especially the ones that nobody had the right to create or enforce in the first place. In so do doing, three things happen.
First, you remind people that most rules aren’t really rules – they’re devices deployed to control you. To keep you average. To preserve the status quo.
Secondly, the willingness to break stupid rules demonstrates the willingness to think for yourself. And in a world where most people delegate the task of thinking to the mediocre masses, doing so is an act of heroism it itself.
Finally, being a rule breaker pulls people out of their petty preoccupations. It helps them overcome physical and psychological barriers that once stood between them and their goals.
Ultimately, it makes them look in the rear-view mirror of their life and think, “Really? That’s it? That’s what I’ve been scared of this whole time? Psht!” What stupid rules badly need to be broken?
4. Advertise your absence of hesitation. With the proliferation of steroid abuse, unsportsmanlike behavior and other character deficiencies, it’s nice to know that (some) athletes are still truly heroic.
Take Albert Polios, for example – my hometown hero. His legacy comes not from his bat, but from his battle.
The Pujols Family Foundation is a non-profit organization is dedicated to the love, care and development of people with Down Syndrome and their families; as well as the provision of medical and dental care to poor citizens of the Dominican Republic, Albert’s home country.
The best part: Albert never hesitates. On or off the field. And from his shining example, each of us could learn a few lessons. First: Heroes don’t hesitate to be pinch hitters. Whom could you go to bat for this week?
Second: Heroes don’t hesitate to be the sacrifice that would count. Are you prepared to give up something for what you know is right?
Third: Heroes don’t hesitate to play the hardest position. When your team needs a catcher during the hottest day of the year, will you step up to the plate?
Remember: He who hesitates isn’t just lost – he’s cost. What icy river do you need to suck it up and jump into?
5. Give voice to concerns that count. I recently listened to a fascinating NPR interview with actor Louis Gossett, Jr. The reporter said:
“One of the things that’s interesting about you is that you have an experience and then you often convert it into activism. Like when you were diagnosed with prostate cancer you then started talking about prostate cancer and telling people to get tested. Is that part of your own spiritual journey?”
In response, Gossett explained, “I think we all have to. It comes from the old days almost before integration. ‘Each one, teach one,’ I like to say. Because we’re on this planet not for what we can get but what we can give. And if I learn something successfully, I want to pass it on.”
What about you? I wonder experiences (that gnawed your heart away) you could use to help give voice to concerns that count. What are you turning your problems into?
6. Give yourself away. My definition of the word “hero” was forever changed when I read David Dunn’s 1943 classic Try Giving Yourself Away. To me, it was one of those books you didn’t even need to read because the title was so good.
Of course, I still read it. And loved it. Especially passages like this:
“If you start to give of yourself, be it ever so simple a fashion, the world will observe your spirit and show you many needs that you can supply. There are a hundred ways of giving away little margins of time you will never miss, which could be riches to someone.”
If that’s not a description of a hero, I don’t know what is. Lesson learned: Heroism is the ancestor of generosity. What’s your game plan for giving yourself away to the people who matter?
REMEMBER: The world will always need heroes.
From customers to employees, from children to family members and from readers to listeners, I challenge you to commit to being somebody’s hero today.
Who knows? Maybe you won’t even need those purple spandex after all.
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Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Entrepreneur, Mentor
[email protected]
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So, apparently, there’s a mold.
I was not aware of this.
I just assumed everyone thought for themselves.
Guess not.
According to a recent scientific study that I conducted yesterday by asking four of my friends, most people are other people. What’s more, further research proves that most people have no problem letting the world think for them.
Which, I guess I understand. It’s easier, faster, safer, cheaper and requires significantly less work.
THE ONLY PROBLEM IS: When you fail to question the constitution of the walls that enclose you, you insulate yourself from growth, learning and expansion.
If that scares you (which it should) consider this list of eight ways to break the mold without bruising your budget: (Photo credit from artist James Simon.)1. Be an obstructionist. Nothing illegal, Tex. Just the willingness to raise your hand and say, “Wait a sec – that’s not right.” This is the baseline posture where all mold breaking begins. When you let the world know that you’re not content to be a cog. When you refuse to the let the illusion play.
Instead, as an obstructionist, you stand up when everyone else stands mute. Then, inflamed with ardent desire, you verbalize your frustration and raise a howl of protest. That’s the only way anything will ever get broken around here. E.E. Cummings was right:
“To be nobody but yourself in a world that’s doing its best to make you somebody else, is to fight the hardest battle you are ever going to fight.”
Remember: Breaking the mold means breaking the silence. Make your voice heard by the people who matter. Have you raised your hand today?
2. Swim against the tide of what’s expected. When I assumed the presidency of my local association, my first mold-breaking order of business was to excise as much fat from our process as possible.
From removing redundant board procedures to axing inactive members that never attended meeting to deleting stupid expenses that drained organizational resources, the goal was to become lean and nimble. That way we could evolve as a chapter, as opposed to living a continued existence as an irrelevant integer.
The cool part was, all we had to do was stop, tilt our heads to the left and ask, “Why do we have to do it that way?” And most of the time, there was rarely an answer other than, “to satisfy the conventions of people who don’t matter.”
That’s how we broke the mold. That’s how we resurrected our chapter. And you have a similar choice in your own life, whether it’s organizational or personal: Will you yield gracefully to necessity or kneel obediently to mediocrity?
3. Exercise proactivity in environments designed to mitigate it. Some people will try to force you comply with their preferences; often times without rational justification or without respectful permission.
When this happens, the smartest thing you can do is to speak with a clear, sharp and committed voice. Let people know that you’ll be thinking for yourself, thank you very much. And that if they try to pull that stunt again, you’re gone.
Instead, declare yourself a victor with your own voice. Otherwise you’re nothing but a copy machine.
Remember: Your true colors are very bright. Do not let people dull them. Within each of us there is a spirit ready to respond to the world. That’s weapon that wasn’t meant to be holstered. Are you willing to stand up for what you believe at the cost of alienating people who don’t matter?
4. Create a juxtaposition that creates a reaction. While sitting outside of a local coffee shop yesterday, I watched two canvassers struggle to engage passerbys. During their break, I approached them and asked, “Have you guys ever thought about buying hot chocolate and handing out drinks to people instead of annoying them?”
The two girls laughed. I guess they thought I was kidding.
“Seriously, that would work,” I explained more passionately than necessary. “Think about it: It’s cold, it’s rainy and nobody wants to talk to you. But by unexpectedly offering hot chocolate, you’d break the pattern of predictability. And by delivering value first, you’d earn conversational permission. Ultimately, you’d engage people in a non-threatening way instead of verbally spamming them with unwanted noise about your cause.”
They stared at me like I was a homeless meth addict convinced he was Jesus.
I shrugged and walked away. Guess breaking the mold isn’t part of the Greenpeace Outreach Training Program. Sucks for the whales. What type of reaction are you creating through juxtaposition?
5. Assertively choose (not) to take action. As much as I advocate execution, sometimes the best way to break the mold is to do nothing while the rest of the world scrambles in fear. I’ve actually tried this before, and the results are stunning. Silence truly is eloquent testimony. And the world almost always pays attention, too.
Try this: Next time chaos erupts, choose not to mindlessly follow the masses with the standard-issue fight or flight response. Instead, try the third option. The one nobody tells you about:
Freeze.
Become the calmest person in the room. The strength of your stillness will shatter the mold into a million pieces. Remember: Courage comes from the paths you choose not to pursue. What action can you avoid this week?
6. Pick the box that says, “Other.” The world will try to put you in a box. And by “the world,” I mean: Parents. Friends. Customers. Coworkers. Colleagues. Competitors. Bosses. Strangers. The media. Organizations you belong to.
For example, in my professional association, there is a form all new members fill out to indicate the topic on which they give presentations. There’s only about two-dozen options. And unfortunately, no boxes for “approachability,” “execution” or “making a name for yourself.”
Which is precisely why I picked the box that says, “other.” Because I don’t need their box. And neither do you. In fact, the moment you realize that you don’t need people’s box is the moment you are set free. That’s when you look up from laptop and think, “Wait: There’s a mold?” Which box will you pick?
7. You can’t go through life in a straight line. Personally, I was never in the mold to begin with. Hell, I didn’t even know there was a mold. I don’t know about you, but I am under the highest obligations to defy conventional attitudes. It’s who I am. It’s who I’ve always been. And it’s probably who I’ll always be.
What can I say? I was born to be a delightful disturbance. And admittedly, my emotional predisposition for non-conformity has gotten me into some trouble over the years.
Fortunately, nothing serious. Nothing that hurt anybody. Nothing I wouldn’t update on my Facebook status. And nothing I’ll be ashamed to tell my grandchildren about. But I still chose to make waves, stilled rocked the boat and still shook people out of their petty preoccupations. Because in my experience, that’s the only way anything gets upgraded. Do you refuse to be satisfied with looking just once?
8. Refuse to live a life of zero distinction. George Carlin said it best, “Schools are indoctrination centers where kids are sent to be stripped of their individuality and turned into obedient soul dead conformist members of the American consumer culture.”
Lesson learned: If you want to break the mold, try breaking away from poisonous orbits. And not just schools. But whatever force, organization or corporate monolith attempts to crush your spirit – be conscious of their power. Be careful whom you listen to.
And remember that there’s no point in being scared of the system. That’s nothing but a waste of energy. Instead, as the voice inside you grows more urgent, channel your ambition into an organized campaign of disquiet.
Take what’s inside, push it out in an unrestrained manner and bring truth to power. That’s how you become an artist, says Nietzsche, who believed that art raises its hand where creeds relax. Is yours ready to flail in the air?
REMEMBER: Breaking the mold isn’t (just) about being different.
It’s about doing your own thinking.
It’s about crushing the confines of convention.
It’s about being the exception to as many rules as possible.
It’s about becoming the person you were before the world made you into what it wanted you to be.
Do that, and you won’t just break the mold – you’ll shatter it.
Then again, you could always do what I do and say, “What mold?”
After all, the best way to break the mold to remember that it doesn’t exist.
LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What are you breaking?
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For the list called, “15 Ways to Out Learn Your Competitors,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Entrepreneur, Mentor
[email protected]
Never the same speech twice.
Always about approachability.
Watch The Nametag Guy in action here!
Put away your red cape.
Forget about your alter ego.
And cancel the order on those purple spandex.
Being a hero isn’t what the comic books portray it as.
Here’s the reality:
To live heroically is to consistently commit to (and act from) the best, highest version of yourself – every day.
That’s the real superpower.
Today we’re going to explore part one of a collection of ideas (read part two!) to help you become a hero to the people who matter:1. Decide to matter. In his book, Coaching the Artist Within, Eric Maisel spends a sizable chunk of time talking about passionately making meaning.
“There is no meaning until you make it,” he says. “Don’t sit around waiting for the universe, some guru or some book to shape your personal path. Proclaim your intention to live meaningfully and authentically.”
Lesson learned: Mattering is a decision. Otherwise you end up a desperate revolutionary without a cause, exhausted by endless effort that doesn’t count. Not very heroic.
Remember: When each pulse is filled with significance, you’re always seen as a hero. Even if only in your own eyes. Have you decided to matter yet?
2. Be a mirror. Being a hero doesn’t mean you have to do something great. Being a hero means you have to be the mirror that reflects (and infects) people with their own ability to do something great.
That’s the big misconception: Heroes are less concerned with being successful and more focused on who is successful because of them. After all, it’s not who you know – it’s whose life is noticeably better because they know you.
One strategy is to ask people Territory Questions. According to Steven Pressfield’s The War of Art, your territory is the place, arena or activity where the sustenance comes from the act itself – not from the impression it makes on others. And if you ask people questions like:
“If you were feeling really anxious, what would you do?”
“If you were the last person on earth, what would you still do everyday?”
…you gain a greater understanding of where their territory is. Then, you reflect it back to them. Because normally, they’d be too close to themselves to see it.
Do that, and people will thank you forever. How do you inspire others of a vision of what they can contribute?
3. Become a walking permission slip. People want someone who makes it okay for them. Okay to do what they think is silly. Okay to be their true self when the alternative is more popular. And okay to risk feeling an emotion that exposes their weaknesses.
This reminds me of a presentation I gave in Charlotte a few years back. After the program, a woman came up and hugged me. In tears. For twelve seconds.
This has happened maybe five times in my career. But if you can believe it, what she thanked me for wasn’t the content of the speech, but the fact that I was wearing jeans and sandals during the speech. (Pretty standard for my style.)
Anyway, Susan told me that she’d been wrestling with the option of dressing in a more casual, relaxed and unique fashion to work, but didn’t have the courage to make the switch. But apparently, after seeing my presentation, Susan felt as if I’d given her permission to do so.
Lesson learned: When you begin to live your authentic life, you give people subtle permission that it’s okay for them to do the same. You don’t need to wear sandals – you just need to express yourself freely and fully. How are you validating people?
4. Give your voice widening access. As we’ve already learned, being a heroic isn’t all about you. However, if you want to champion ideas, challenge hearts and change minds, you’ve got to step into (some of) the spotlight. Otherwise you’re just winking in the dark.
The secret is to build a unique platform for reaching the people who matter. And keep in mind; the word “platform” is traditionally used to describe the bridge between writers and readers. Not anymore. In my experience, platform is nothing but your entire engine of visibility. Online or offline.
And whether you want to be a hero to your customers and employees, to your children and friends, or to your readers and listeners, visibility is absolutely essential. Your voice must to be accessible to them.
From daily blogs to weekly family dinners to monthly staff meetings to quarterly vacations, your challenge is to build your platform based on the way your people prefer to be reached. Only then will you be able to infect them with a vision of what they can do. How are you making people aware of your voice?
5. Make others look like heroes. Every time I give a speech, I have two primary responsibilities: First, to be amazing; and second, to make the person who booked me look like a hero.
Because in the back of my mind, I know what she’s thinking in the back of her mind: Will this guy deliver? That’s what happens any time someone hires, books, engages or commissions you – they put their ass on the line. And if you suck, they look stupid; and if they look stupid, they look for a new job.
For that reason, you have to establish expectational clarity. You have to telegraph your reliability. And you have to deliver a series of small promises consistently.
The only caveat is, they have to be the right promises. You get no brownie points for delivering what the customer doesn’t ask for or doesn’t need. Focus on that, and you’ll make heroes out of the people who matter. Who have you made your cohort in heroic crime?
REMEMBER: The world will always need heroes.
From customers to employees, from children to family members and from readers to listeners, I challenge you to commit to being somebody’s hero today.
Who knows? Maybe you won’t even need those purple spandex after all.
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To whom are you a hero?
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* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Entrepreneur, Mentor
[email protected]
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Like many entrepreneurs, I go to Starbucks a lot.
But not for the coffee.
Or the snacks. Or the ambiance. Or the cool music. Or the free wifi.
I go there because I’m lonely.
I go there because I crave human interaction.
I go there because I need to talk to real people every day.
That’s something they don’t teach you at Harvard Business School. Or at the Chamber of Commerce. Or in the pages of FastCompany magazine.
Being an entrepreneur is bloody lonely.
Don’t get me wrong. I wouldn’t trade my job for anything on the planet.
The fact that I get to make my own schedule, make my own decisions, make my own money and make a measurable difference in the world – all while doing what I love – is an honor and a privilege.
Oh, and the eight-second commute isn’t bad either.
But. When the (inevitable) loneliness starts to creep in like a toxic mist, you need to use every ounce of your creative capacity to stay connected, stay supported and stay afloat.
Otherwise the isolation will drive you insane, and will drive your business into the ground.
Here’s a collection of strategies to help you handle the loneliness of that comes with the entrepreneurial territory:
1. Detect the tremors. Like a seismograph that monitors tectonic activity, your goal is to identify the vibrations of approaching loneliness. Even if they’re just minor tremors. Think of them as an early warning system to take preemptive action against the onslaught of aloneness.
Ideally, the secret is to listen to your body. After all, it will never lie to you. It just depends on how you manifest anxiety physiologically. Do you sweat? Get headaches? Get heartaches? What happens to your body when you realize that you’ve been stranded at your desk for six hours without a single shred of human interaction?
For me, I experience a steady (but not overwhelming) flood of mental panic. It’s miserable but manageable. And most of the time, I can nip it in the bud before it morphs into a full-on freak out.
But it wasn’t always that way. When I first started my company in 2002, I didn’t quite have the mental, emotional and spiritual constitution to handle such anxiety. That was usually around the time I’d crawl into the fetal position and cry myself to sleep in the corner. Good thing I learned how to detect the tremors. How will you pinpoint impending loneliness?
2. Get the hell out of the house. If you work out of your home, physical displacement is a crucial component to success. Not only to prevent you from losing your mind and pulling each of your individual hairs out with a needle-nose pliers. But also for supporting, enriching, inspiring and informing your work.
What’s more, physical displacement alters your routines and patterns. Which stimulates creativity and feeds your social spirit. Even if it’s just for five minutes. What’s more, getting your self-employed ass out of the house actually makes more you a more relatable entrepreneur.
Like poet John Lecarre said, “A desk is a dangerous place to rule the world.” My suggestion is to build it into your schedule. Even if that means taking your laptop to Starbucks for one hour every afternoon. You’ll be glad you did.
Especially if that cute barista with the two-toned hair and the shoulder tattoos is working. How many hours straight (with no break) did you work yesterday?
3. Align with the like-hearted, not just the like-minded. If all you do is hang out with people who think the way same as you, you won’t learn, you won’t grow and you won’t be pushed. Switch it up. Find people who share a common constitution. A mutual why. A shared purpose.
I call these individuals “like-hearted,” and they’re essential to combating entrepreneurial loneliness. They will ignite your spirit faster and brighter than people whose brainstuff is nothing but a mirror of your own thinking. Ideally, for every like-minded person you spend time with; find three like-hearted people to balance the ratio out.
Still hang with (some) people who think like you. Just remember: When you surround yourself with those who get it – and, more importantly, those get YOU – winning is three times easier. Minimum. Do the five people you spend the most time with ask the same questions as you?
4. Make use of every medium. I’m tired of reading articles about how text messaging, instant messaging, Facebook, Twitter and other social media outlets are time-wasting distractions.
First of all, when you’ve been sitting at a desk in your basement for three days straight with nobody to talk to but your goldfish – who, by the way, has been really whiny lately – you will welcome whatever form of communication you can get your mitts on.
Secondly, for those of us who work remotely (or with clients that we never actually meet in person), electronic communication is all we have. Don’t let some conservative teabagger from FOX News convince you that Twitter isn’t worth your time.
Look: Do what you need to do to get your fix. Indulge in your humanity with whatever mediums work for you. Just don’t do it at the expense of executing what matters.
Otherwise you’ll get sucked into the seductive vortex of instant communication and wind up trading loneliness for out-of-business-ness. How do you stay connected during lonely days?
5. Invite people to virtual lunches. This strategy saved me. Seriously. If didn’t do regular virtual lunches with the same few people each month, I would snap like a Slim Jim. Not just from the loneliness, but from a lack of seeing the people I love. Especially the ones who live out of town that I only see five times a year.
If you find yourself in this situation, here’s how you do a virtual lunch. About a month ahead of time, decide on a call time that’s convenient for both parties. Remember to be cognizant of differing time zones. On the day of, cook, prepare, order – or, if you’re Ted Nugent, kill – your lunch for the appointment.
Then, at the agreed upon time, sign onto Skype. And the spend the next sixty minutes of your lunch break sharing, listening, eating and connecting with someone who’s important to you.
That’s it. It’s easy, free and fun. Plus you don’t have to get dressed. Which, depending on who you call, might be very awkward, or totally awesome. You may never hang up.
Actually, forget that last suggestion. Wear clothes.
Either way, doing regular virtual lunches – say, three a month – is the perfect way to spice up your weekly schedule. Sure beats sitting on your couch watching Tropic Thunder for the sixtieth time while eating a cold can of Schnuck’s Chili Beans and feeling sorry for yourself. Whom could you invite to a virtual lunch this week?
ULTIMATELY: Loneliness is an inevitable landmark of the entrepreneurial landscape.
Not that you would trade in your lifestyle.
But that’s the thing about a career.
A career won’t curl up with you on a cold night.
A career won’t listen to your problems without judgment.
A career won’t send you a text message that makes you laugh until you pee.
A career won’t call you on your lies and delightfully disturb you into becoming better.
You need people.
You need social interaction.
You need conversation with other human beings.
Otherwise you will go crazy.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve been sitting here in my living room for the past six hours working in my pajamas, and it’s probably a good time to take a Starbucks break.
God I hate getting dressed before noon.
LET ME ASK YA THIS…
How do you handle the inevitable loneliness of entrepreneurship?
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For the list called, “34 Questions to Keep Your Company Growth Minded,” send an email to me, and I’ll send you the list for free!
* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Entrepreneur, Mentor
[email protected]
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“Nobody noticed if he was good looking. When Francisco d’Anconia entered a room, it was simply impossible to look at anyone else. He had a name that wiped out all others when people saw it.”
That’s my favorite scene from Atlas Shrugged.
Why?
It’s about intrigue.
It’s about fascination.
It’s about interestingness.
IN SHORT: It’s about being an object of interest in the minds of the people who matter.
Is that the way people describe you?
Is that the way people describe your brand?
Is that the way people describe your organization?
If not, try this: 1. Autobiography is irresistible. Since day one, you’ve been beaten over the head with the same three words: Know your customer, know your customer and know your customer. Which is great and all, but here’s the real question:
How well do your customers know you?
Answer: Not enough. And they need to know who you are, where you are and why you are. That’s what matters. Because if trust is a function of self-disclosure (which it is), and if trust is the only currency that counts (which it is) – if they don’t know you, you lose.
No need to run around the office naked. But do find a way to give people a snapshot. A glimpse into that which the world cannot usually see. By enticing their visual appetite by dangling the carrot of fascination in front of their nose, your interestingness will skyrocket. Is the bio page on your website worth showing to a friend?
2. Detail creates a vortex of interest. Adam Durtiz, in my opinion, is the most devastating lyricist in modern music. After fifteen years of listening to Counting Crows, his style has served as a barometer for my own. And as a write, I constantly ask myself:
“Does this sentence use the detail of Duritz?”
If not, I replace mundane, lifeless words with smarter, muscular, more specific words. This makes the piece more readable and interesting. Plus, it satisfies the advice given by Kurt Vonnegut, who once said, “If you want to write a bestseller, be a great date for your reader.”
What about you? Are the details of your life interesting enough to make it through dinner? Or would your date fake a cell phone call from her roommate just to get out of listening to you? That’s the power of detail. Be specific or be ignored. Are you worth writing home about?
3. Monstrously human means monumentally noticeable. Reality television is popular for two reasons. First, it’s incredibly cheap to make. That’s what happens when you stop casting actors and start using citizens. Secondly, the human factor is off the charts. This makes it easier for viewers to see themselves reflected in the people on the screen.
Now, odds are, you won’t be staring in your own reality show anytime soon. But that doesn’t mean you can’t invite people for a leisurely swim in your massive sea of humanity. I’m not promoting rampant narcissism, inflated self-importance or a violation of personal privacy.
Rather, I’m suggesting you sack up and show more of true self to world. Your audience doesn’t just expect it – they demand it. Give the people what they want. Take them behind the scenes.
When they see that what you do on a daily basis speaks straight to the heart of the human experience, it will be hard (not) to pay attention. Turn yourself into a walking mirror. How are you fully integrating your humanity into your profession?
4. Depth is the greatest of heights. Think about the last person you stalked. Oh whatever. Don’t tell me you’ve never gone to a guy’s Facebook page (two hours before meeting him in person) and carefully scrutinized each of the three hundred pictures in his photo album.
Don’t act like you’ve never spent your entire lunch hour googling the woman you were going on a date with later that week. Everybody does it. Admit it: We’re all a bunch of stalkers.
But, there’s a valuable lesson to be learned: Nobody stalks boring people. The more depth you have offline, the more interesting you become online. And as long as stalkers keep it in their pants and don’t cross any dangerous lines, I say: Stalk away. It’s a high compliment.
In fact, I once went on a date with a woman whose mother spent four hours Googling me just to decide whether or not she approved of her daughter dating me. Turns out she didn’t. Apparently men who “wear nametags everyday” and “build hotel room forts in the Rosemont Days Inn” are “weird” and “should never be trusted.”
Whatever. That chick looked like Ron Howard’s brother anyway.
The point is: Don’t be a flat person. Create a persona worth looking at and listening to. One-dimensional people are about as fascinating as a tube of denture glue. Are you worth stalking?
5. Demand an explanation. As a lifelong writer, science has been never my forte. And yet, I see physics as the most interesting subject on the planet. Imagine: You’re either dealing with numbers too big to imagine or too small to comprehend. Life doesn’t get more fascinating than that.
And that’s the lesson: When you become the kind of person for whom onlookers demand an explanation, people can’t help but wait with baited breath.
Like my mentor, Bill. The reason he’s such an object of interest is because you’re always curious what his next move will be. What about you? How do you create a sense of anticipation in everything you do? Answer those questions and you’ll attract the eyeballs that matter. What questions are people asking about you?
6. Suspend disbelief for as long as possible. When I tell people that I made a career out of wearing a nametag, they either think I’m a liar, a lunatic – or both. What’s interesting is that the less people believe me, the more questions they ask.
They simply can’t help themselves. Human beings are inherently curious beings. And part of their nature is to reduce uncertainty whenever possible. It helps people preserve their sense of control.
The irony is, when you suspend disbelief and become the object of interest, you have the control. Which means you have the power. Will you use yours for good or evil?
7. Reveal the record of your origins. I love old trees. They never fail to be objects of interest because their rings, branches, roots and bark always take me back in time. Your challenge is to do the same. To give people a ride on the wayback machine.
For example, I used to work in a furniture store in Portland that covered their walls with black and white photos, newspaper clippings, decade-old advertisements and antiquated business cards. People would come to the store just to look at the walls. No wonder they did twelve million a year. Ask yourself:
What artifacts could you use on your website, in your office or at your store to personify your humble beginnings?
Remember: Customers love this stuff. Artifacts lend personality to your surroundings, humanize your organization and build the fascination and intrigue of your brand. Are the relics of your origins collecting dust or compelling eyeballs?
8. Never underestimate the intrigue of honesty. That’s the interesting thing about telling the truth: It’s so rare that it’s become remarkable. No wonder nobody watches television anymore – they’re tired of being lied to.
Maybe that’s the secret. Maybe being an object of interest is as simple as not bullshitting people. It certainly worked for Scott Adams. His philosophy, according to The Dilbert Future, is to be completely honest where most people would say nothing. He’s done that for twenty years and become one of the most successful cartoonists in history. What would happen if you branded your honesty?
9. Be a synthesizer. This is, by far, my favorite musical instrument. And you don’t have to be a big fan of electronic music to admit: They’re pretty damn interesting. Probably because they create sound combinations that are outlets for emotions and feelings that can’t be adequately articulated in plain language.
Now, as an individual, your challenge is to do the same: To be a synthesizer. That’s one thing all objects of interest have in common. Take Henry Rollins, for example. The reason big audiences pay big money to sit for three hours at a time – just to hear him talk – is not an accident.
They do so because the composite of his synthesized experiences as a punk rocker, author, world traveler, political activist and television/radio host make him so compelling that his audiences demand to hear more immediately. No wonder he’s done over one hundred talking shows worldwide, every year, since the nineties.
Even Rollins admitted this himself in an interview with The Independent Film Channel: “My goal is to be completely interesting, take whatever intellect I’ve accumulated and come out hard from the gate every night.”
Remember: Be anything but monotone. Remain a consummate adventurer and you’ll remain a competitive animal. What are you synthesizing?
10. Firm up your faculty of self-expression. I watch a lot of documentaries. Mainly about artists, writers and actors. And in my experience, the reason these movies are so interesting is because the featured individuals are masters of self-expression. They create highly visual experiences with their work.
Lesson learned: If you want to become an object of interest, you have to express yourself. Period. It doesn’t matter how you do it – only that you do it. And it doesn’t matter if it’s good – on that you’re willing to share it with the world.
The hard part is, sometimes the theater of the mind is better. I know. Sometimes you’d rather keep your art to yourself. But if you truly want to arrest the interest of masses, you’ve got to expose (at least) some of it to the eyes of the world.
Remember: Art, as Edward Debono once said, is the choreography of attention. How much of it will your self-expression earn?
Ultimately, becoming an object of interest isn’t something that happens overnight.
It’s the result of a life lived fully, actively and creativity.
Remember that, and next time you walk into a room, it will be impossible to look at anybody else.
LET ME ASK YA THIS…
Are you an object of interest?
LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For the list called, “15 Ways to Out Learn Your Competitors,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!
* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Entrepreneur, Mentor
[email protected]
Never the same speech twice.
Always about approachability.
Watch The Nametag Guy in action here!
Occasionally, people will walk up to me and rip off my nametag.
This used to upset me.
I thought it was rude, invasive and disrespectful.
But after a few years, I got over it. Plus I got over myself. And I realized that people were just having fun. No need to cause a scene.
Besides, I have twenty pre-written nametags in my wallet at all times.
Not to mention a tattoo on my chest.
LESSON LEARNED: People can rip off your tag, but they can never steal your truth.
What about you? Are you prepared to walk your truth in a world of (mostly) fiction?
Here’s a collection of practices to you stay unquestionably committed to yourself:1. Committing to yourself is not a selfish act. That’s the first realization that needs to settle in: That you deserve to walk your truth. That you’re worth it to be honest to. It’s not selfish.
In fact, it’s the exact opposite. After all, you can’t commit to others if you haven’t first committed to yourself. Don’t worry: You’ll still have time to support the people who matter.
And yes, there will be plenty of times when your job – as a leader, as a parent, as a professional – demands that you take a back seat to others. Cool. Good call.
Just remember: The longer you go without putting your own name on your list, the harder it will be (and the guiltier you will feel) when you eventually try to take time for yourself. Think of it as a form of tithing.
As Myrtle Barringer wrote in her widely popular article, Putting Yourself First Without the Baggage of Guilt:
“Having the time to nourish and take care of ourselves has a tendency to take a back seat to all the other responsibilities we juggle. We naturally want to serve and be available to those we love. However, it often leaves us drained, tired and sometimes sick when we don’t stop to recharge our own battery.”
Who knows? Maybe walking your truth is as simple as taking a walk by yourself. How high are you on your own list?
2. Stay away from editors. Unless you’re a professional writer, delete all editors from your life. You know the people I’m talking about:
The ones who constantly correct everything you do. The ones who relentlessly require you to adjust who you are to accommodate their selfish needs. The ones who incessantly ensure that you’re molded into their idealized version of a person.
Yeah. Those people. I call them editors. And if you’re not careful, they will yank you off the path of your truth and lead you down a dangerous cul-de-sac of dishonesty.
That’s why I love my family: After thirty years, they’ve never asked me to edit myself.
They know I’m crazy. They know I’m different. And they know that certain parts of who I am will never change. And they’re okay with that. Because they’re all the exact same way. Normality isn’t exactly a common branch in the Ginsberg family tree.
And likewise, I would never ask them to edit themselves either. That’s how we roll at my house. Are you surrounding yourself with people who don’t ask you to edit yourself?
3. Win the battle over terminal certainty. In a recent article in Oprah Magazine, Mike Robbins writes:
“When we focus on winning or being right, we no longer can access the deepest places within our heart, which is where our real truth comes from. When we let go of our attachment to the outcome of a conversation, what the other person thinks and our erroneous obsession with always having to be right, we give ourselves the opportunity to get real.”
Lesson learned: Be right less. Kick your addiction to terminal certainty. Develop a healthy predisposition to compromise by becoming flexible enough to bend when needed, but without compromising your foundation.
You’ll be walking your truth in no time. Are you focusing on being right or being real?
4. Attract others with equal commitment. There’s a reason that the world perks up and notices when you walk your truth: Because honesty is so rare, it’s become remarkable.
I’m reminded of Brett Dennen’s song, Because You Are a Woman: “The self sin and struggle crowd the sidewalk, parading pose with phones and paper cups. But you walk like truth to a world of fiction.”
This lyric inspired my official definition of honesty: “Honoring the truth, your truth and other people’s truth, while standing on the edge of yourself to salute others without the desire to change, fix or improve them.”
The cool part is, once you employ this philosophy in your daily life, other committed people don’t just notice you – they join you. And this is a good thing. Their unique commitment will both inspire and challenge your own, keeping your accountable to walking your truth when the world expects fiction. How committed are the five people you eat lunch with the most?
5. Behave as the most truthful representation of who you are. The big challenge of walking your truth is that nobody knows it better than you. Which means the only person who can truly tell when you’ve accidentally taken a detour, is you. Better learn how to kick your own ass.
A helpful question to ask yourself throughout your day is, “If I were me, what would I do?”
Yes, it sounds silly. And yes, most people will probably never, ever ask themselves this question. Too confrontational. But in my experience, with this kind of casual dissociation, you stand on the outside looking in. You take an objective stance on your own actions and thus, keep yourself accountable to yourself.
Even if all you do is raise a smidgen of awareness, you win. What question will you ask to stay on the path of self-honesty?
6. Play the music – don’t just show people the notes. Superficiality is bankruptcy. If you want to walk your truth, stay away from “superfluous exertions,” as Seneca wrote in Letters to a Stoic. Such endeavors do nothing but set your commitment back another thousand years.
Instead, find the unique song you were made to sing. And in the distinctive voice you were given to sing it with, belt that baby out with all your might.
If you do that on a daily basis in a respectful, remarkable and real way, the people won’t just take notice – they’ll take a number. And if you’re lucky, their wallets will open faster than a cheerleader on prom night. What is the music of your truth?
7. Exercise enhances honesty. In a 2006 article in Yoga Journal, editor Andrea Kowalski wrote:
“If you often feel that you need to censor yourself in conversation, you may be compromising your fifth chakra, the throat chakra. The gateway between the head and the heart, this energy center includes the neck, the shoulders, the mouth, and the thyroid and parathyroid glands. If the throat is in balance, you will feel comfortable speaking your truth to all people, in any situation.”
Now, whether or not you subscribe to the principles of yoga or Hinduism, there’s still a valuable lesson to be learned: You can’t walk your truth if you don’t work your body.
Doesn’t mean you need to start training for a marathon. But daily exercise accomplishes more than just conditioning your carcass – it’s also training your truth. Especially when you feel sore afterward.
That’s the best part: You feel alive, you feel strong and you know your body is talking to you. And your body will always tell you the truth. How many workouts did you get in last week?
8. Establish a practice. Emerson once said, “It is easy in the world to live after the world’s opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.”
My suggestion is to practice with distractions. To learn to remain calm in the midst of chaos. By doing so in smaller situations, you develop a deeper ability to walk your truth through the larger storm on the horizon.
For example, yoga class has been a blessing for me in this respect. I’ve become a master at practicing with distractions. Because in any given class, I’ll be confronted with parking lot car alarms, smelly people dripping their sweat on my matt, and of course, beautiful women – wearing almost nothing – bending at the waist directly in front of me.
Nice try, ladies. But I took my contacts out in the locker room, thank you very much.
If you can stay committed to your core during that distraction, you can pretty much do anything. What practice arena will train you to walk your truth when the road gets rocky?
REMEMBER: The primary battle is always within.
After all, if you don’t walk your truth in a world of mostly fiction, you don’t really own your life.
I challenge you to commit to yourself unquestionably. Who knows? Maybe one day somebody will try to rip your nametag off too.
And if they do, just give me a call.
I think I might have a few extra.
LET ME ASK YA THIS…
When you walk your truth, what kind of footprints do you leave?
LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
For the list called, “17 Ways to Out Create the Competition,” send an email to me, and I’ll send you the list for free!
* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Entrepreneur, Mentor
[email protected]
Who’s quoting YOU?
Check out Scott’s Online Quotation Database for a bite-sized education on branding success!
Sometimes, it sucks being the youngest one in room.
And by “sometimes,” I mean, “every excruciating hour of your workday.”
Think about it:
Nobody takes you seriously.
The world refuses to listen to your voice.
And the people you work with are twice your age, have three times your knowledge and four times your experience.
What’s a kid to do?
Instead of going postal on your entire office with a semi-automatic machine gun (which isn’t as effective as it sounds, trust me) here’s a collection of strategies, practices and practical advice on making a name for yourself as a young professional:1. Build a timeline of credibility. I started my career as a writer and speaker when I was twenty-two. That meant standing in front of hundreds (sometimes thousands) of complete strangers – who had no logical reason to take me seriously.
Think about it: No advanced degrees. No real work experience. No amazing story of overcoming adversity. Just some dorky guy, standing on stage, wearing a nametag. Would you take me seriously? Hell no. And that was my deficit position. That’s what I had working against me.
Except for one thing: I did write a book.
Now, it wasn’t the best book. It wasn’t the best-selling book. But it was a still a book. And considering the fact that most people in the world have a book inside of them – but never get it out – I found myself in a potentially advantageous position.
That’s why I went out of my way to make sure that every single person knew about the book immediately: I told them personally, I asked other people to tell them personally, sometimes I even gave five hundred copies of my book to the entire audience. I didn’t care. Whatever it took. These people were going to recognize whatever slice of credibility I could serve up within thirty seconds. Period.
The cool part is: You don’t need a book to do this. Execution is the great qualifier. Your challenge is to represent whatever measurable successes you’ve achieved in visible, tangible ways – then punch people in the face with it.
And not in an arrogant way. Focus on expressing yourself, not proving yourself, and people’s receptivity to your voice will rise. How will you reinforce your positive pattern of execution?
2. Consider the source. As a young professional, people you work with may use your age as a target. Some might downplay your contributions. Some might highlight your lack of experience. Some might reinforce your supposed intellectual deficiencies. And some might even come off as plain mean – even if their intent is nothing but a friendly jostling.
My first suggestion: Relax. These reactions are completely normal. You’re not alone. And while it’s frustrating to be on the receiving end of that stick, consider the source. Remember: If people treat you this way, they’re operating out of fear. That’s what humans do when they’re scared: They scramble for any ammo they can find because they see something valuable and powerful in you.
And that’s my second suggestion: Practice interpreting people’s behavior as subtle recognition of your ability. Every time it happens, tack another notch to your victory column. You’re on the right path. Even if you encounter a few haters on the side of the road. How will you use the criticism to fuel your fire?
3. Respond patiently, yet proactively. “Implicit or explicit ageism may manifest is through the use of patronizing language,” explains a 2005 issue of The Journal of Social Issues. According to the article, people do so through two negative methods of communication.
First, over accommodation. This consists of a person being excessively courteous and speaking simple and short sentences very loudly and slowly – often with an exaggerated tone and high pitch. For example:
“Okay Scott. Here’s how to do this. Put the paper here. Dial the number here. Then wait for the beep. Mmkay?”
Usually, when someone speaks to you like this, it makes you want to pile drive their greasy head in the color copier. Probably not the most mature response.
The second method of patronizing language is baby talk. This involves uncomplicated speech with an exaggerated pitch and tone that people use when talking to babies. For example:
“Have a wucky customer meeting Scotty? Aw. I bet you’d wuv someone to talk to, hmmm?”
Usually, when your boss speaks to you like this, it makes you want head-butt his nose into the back of his skull. Also not the smartest response. My suggestion is to remain patient, yet proactive. Keep your frustration at bay.
Otherwise your reaction will reinforce the very image you’re trying to avoid. How do you handle patronizers?
4. Don’t get sucked into the vortex. Because you’re the youngest person in your office, coworkers may see you as a vault. A safe haven for gossip or trash talk. This is unacceptable, disrespectful and a clear violation of your boundaries. When it happens, let people know three things:
First, you’re not flattered they chose to confide in you.
Secondly, you want no part of their negativity.
Third, you’re not going to laugh along with an obligatory giggle just because they’re the boss.
Stand your ground without stepping on people’s toes. Use these responses to respectfully refuse condoning negative behavior. Odds are, the respect you exude will be returned in light of your willingness to persist.
Either that, or you’ll create mass animosity and get fired for being an insubordinate troublemaker. Either way, you win. Will you be seduced by workplace gamesmanship?
5. Make the mundane memorable. If you find yourself saddled with entry-level duties and tasks, view this as a valuable opportunity to introduce remarkability. First, use the unique knowledge you already have. Then, put yourself positions to play to those strengths.
For example, if you’re an analytical, left-brained, strategic thinker – color everything you do with that brush. Even if you’re just getting coffee, making copies or relaying messages. Remember: People don’t care what you do – they care how you think. That’s what companies notice. That’s what companies remember. And that’s what companies promote.
The second suggestion for making the mundane memorable is to brand yourself as an informed source. Because even if you can’t participate in big decisions, even if you can’t sit at lunch with the big shots and even if you can’t get your name on the super-secret-inner-circle-email-list, you can always be the answer. Not a know-it-all. Not a yes man. Just an answer.
The coolest part is, when you’re positioned as a source for answers, people don’t just come to you – they come back to you. What pervasive, expensive, real and urgent problem does your brain solve – better, faster, smarter and cheaper than the rest of the losers your office?
6. Disarm immediate preoccupation. Here’s a rapid-fire list of the most common stereotypes of young professionals: Apathetic. Disrespectful. A.D.D. Disengaged. Entitlement attitude. Self-centered. Overly opinionated. Unable to communicate face-to-face.
Now, I’m sure the list goes on. And none of these adjectives are based on scientific data. Merely observations and experiences. Still, while those stereotypes might not be accurate – they’re still alive. And it never hurts to know what you’re up against.
First, so you can go out of your way to behave in ways that dispel the stereotype. There’s a simple path to professional development: Just google what world finds annoying about people like you – then do the opposite.
Another advantage of such awareness is to understand how other people experience your generation. More importantly, how other people experience themselves in relation to your generation. Those two elements combined will help you disarm whatever immediate preoccupation stands in your way of being heard. How will you lower your perceived threat level?
7. Acknowledge people’s contribution to your development. “Ungrateful and overly independent.” That’s another stereotype of the younger generation, according to numerous articles, case studies and message boards – not to mention every person I’ve ever met over the age of fifty.
As such, the smartest move you could make is to project a pervasive tone of gratitude.
First of all, this demonstrates your willingness to remain coachable and accept help. After all, success never comes unassisted.
Secondly, your appreciation won’t go unnoticed by your coworkers. That’s the best part about gratitude: Whatever you appreciate, appreciates.
Third, giving credit to the people whose mentoring built your foundation is a mark of maturity and magnanimity. And not everybody in your generation could be described as such.
Ultimately, gratitude is the great gravitator: Of wealth, of success, of assistance and of attention from the people who matter. When was the last time you made an entry into your gratitude journal?
REMEMBER: Just because you’re young doesn’t mean you’re useless.
As the youngest person in your office, you have an opportunity to bring new blood, fresh perspective and youthful energy to the workplace.
Be patient. Be proactive. Be pointed. And be a problem solver.
And maybe you won’t even need that semi-automatic machine gun after all.
LET ME ASK YA THIS…
Are you unafraid of being the youngest person in your office?
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For the list called, “65 Things I Wish Somebody Would Have Told Me When I Started My Company,” send an email to me, and you win the list for free!
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Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Entrepreneur, Mentor
[email protected]
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