It’s not hard to be right.
All we have to do is never ever back down, even when we are in the wrong, cling to our vain hopes in the face of overwhelming contrary evidence, and then, when anyone even remotely challenges our position, double down and scare them away with our declarative verve.
The problem with this approach is, you might be right, but then you will be right and alone. Which is even worse than being wrong.
Spezzano writes in his book about heartbreak that being right is an attempt to prevent pain, but it somehow always leads us right back into it. Being right is an attempt to prove dark beliefs about ourselves or the world.
And so, this performance of parading our own brilliance, reminding everyone that disaster is coming and we, the chosen ones, are always and only right, it is fear taking shape as certainty.
But life has a funny way of proving us wrong, does it not?
Over and over again. Think about it. How many of your beliefs have you outgrown? How many times did you place your faith in an idea that failed you? As my comedian friend reminds me, nobody knows anything, we’re all just guessing.
Turns out, real strength comes from being able to be wrong. Because being wrong is the opportunity give up control. Being wrong is the chance to surrender to the rebuilding of our own understanding. Being is the golden moment to actually pause and connect and go deep and actually learn something about ourselves and others.
It’s like the old saying in the business world:
The sale begins when the customer says no.
Now, this makes us deeply vulnerable. Because once we admit to being wrong about one thing, the possibility is open that we might be wrong about everything.
Perfect. That sounds far more interesting and meaningful and life giving than knowing everything.
And now for a closing benediction about certainty.
May we lessen our stake in being correct.
May we place our desire for truth over our need to be right.
LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What are you still trying to be right about?
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That Guy with the Nametag
Author. Speaker. Strategist. Inventor. Filmmaker. Publisher. Songwriter.
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