Here’s an interesting paradox.
One of the key ways human beings add meaning to our lives by entering into new relationships, commitments and obligations.
And yet, most of the stress we experience comes from poorly managed commitments.
How do we draw the line?
With intention. Take the example of a family vacation. An annual situation in which our normal, healthy routines are thrown out of whack by people who know exactly how to push our buttons.
But instead of feeling burdened by our needs, we announce to ourselves that we take extreme ownership over our boundaries. We accept our need to take special measures to protect our health. We reframe everything we do as a conscious choice. We allow ourselves to do whatever it takes and whatever works to uphold our values.
That way, we can represent ourselves as people whose needs deserve to be taken seriously. That way, before answering family requests impulsively out of a sense of urgency, we’re already clear in our own minds what our commitments would amount to.
Also, let’s not forget the critical piece of trust.
Knowing that if we tell someone no thanks for another piece of pie, or that we require an extra half hour in the morning to get some necessary exercise in, the rest of the family is not going to burst into tears.
People won’t think less of us. They won’t accuse us of selfishly lagging behind. They’ll simply be glad we showed with quality energy that is enjoyable to be around.
Remember, setting and maintaining personal boundaries is a lifelong journey.
Might as well start today.
LET ME ASK YA THIS…
Are you saying yes to requests without paying attention to the hesitation you felt within yourself?
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That Guy with the Nametag
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