It’s not settling, it’s maturity

We spend so much time and energy trying to land the perfect partner, the perfect job, the perfect whatever. 

They have to fit the bill, we warn. Because we are not settling. Not this time. Somebody has a little something called high standards, thank you very much. 

And so, if the stars and planets and moons are not perfectly aligned, then we won’t waste our time. Not getting any younger over here. 

This type of attitude towards our dreams might be noble, but it’s also naïve. 

Ask anyone who has been married for more than a few years. When the right person showed up, all their little rules went out the window. When they met somebody who made their heart flutter, somebody whom they didn’t want their life to be explainable without, all bets were off. 

Farmiga delivered a famous monologue about this very issue:

“When we’re young, we see settling as some sort of a failure. But by the time someone is right for us, it doesn’t feel like settling. And the only person left to judge us will be the young version of ourselves with a target on our back.”

It’s not settling, it’s maturity. 

All of our precious deadlines, requirements, silly lists and checked boxes are counterproductive. They are closing the door to meaningful opportunities and relationships. 

Besides, sometimes we do get exactly what we want, only to find out that it’s not what we really needed. Or that it doesn’t actually fulfill our desires. 

And so, who are we to say what may or may not work for us in the future? 

Perhaps it’s time to surrender our perfectionistic standards of what life should be and open ourselves to what could become. 


What are you willing to give up to get what you say you want?

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Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Author. Speaker. Strategist. Inventor. Filmmaker. Publisher. Songwriter.

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Author. Speaker. Strategist. Songwriter. Filmmaker. Inventor. Gameshow Host. World Record Holder. I also wear a nametag 24-7. Even to bed.
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