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Body image therapists often encourage their patients to avoid stepping on the scale.  Not out of denial or fear or compulsion, but because psychologists know something most people don’t.  Weighing yourself will never make you feel better about your body. Ever.  That’s the problem with a scale. It’s like boarding a sinking ship. It’s not a metric for a person’s value and beauty. It’s just a number on a screen.  Of…

The rule of the mob is, when one dissenter does or says something cruel and offensive and politically polarizing, everyone else has to piggyback and act righteous and get offended too.  Because instinctively, they know that if they don’t, they’ll be judged along with the offender.  Silence is acceptance. When the mob lights the torches and raises the pitchforks to lynch the original dissenter who drew first blood, they…

When the guitarist from my favorite band decided to part ways with the group after twenty years, he published a letter of gratitude to his fans around the world. Walla eloquently stated:  I plan to continue making music, producing records and erring on the side of benevolence and beauty whenever possible. Darkness may find me, but I shall never choose it.  Chris’s words sent a shiver down my spine. Not only…

We’re all given one thing in life that’s a little easier for us than it is for most people.  Call it our divine gift, our zone of genius, our unique talent, what have you. All names aside, its purpose is to whisper to us, specifically in those moments when our sense of competency is assaulted: Hey, why not do everything like you do that thing?  This question is perhaps the most…

Few things are more frustrating than feeling mysteriously drained.  Experiencing that sudden surge of disinterest towards a project or an endeavor that deflates your energy, derails your momentum and disheartens your spirit without fair warning. Blech.  The good news is, there are questions you can ask yourself to uncover the purpose of your depletion. Because whatever you’ve stopped working on might be a hopeless endeavor, on the other hand,…

Running around the forest putting a few chops in each tree doesn’t work.  It’s too labor intensive for not enough reward. It’s too confusing to keep track of all our progress. It’s too enabling to our fear of failure. It’s too difficult to feel a deep sense of satisfaction and accomplishment.  And it’s too infuriating when we circle back to tree number one and discover that new plant life…

I’ve been wearing a nametag twenty four seven for the past seventeen years.  And yet, it’s becoming abundantly clear to me that labels are fables. That obsessing over naming and categorizing and titling and languaging the work that we do can be a misappropriation of mental resources.  It’s one thing to achieve clarity of message and give the marketplace a solid handle by which to carry your product. That’s…

Here’s the problem with angling for small fish.  They’re too hard to catch because they don’t appear on the image sensor. They’re rarely worth the trouble to clean and cook. They’re excessively boney and therefore frustrating to eat. And the only way to truly satisfy your hunger is to scarf down a few dozen of them.  That’s not only smart fishing, that’s a complete lack of understanding of labor…

I once interviewed for a job with a global information services corporation.  The work itself seemed fascinating, but frankly, the workplace seemed frightening. It was cold and stale and gigantic. Trying to visualize myself being happy there was a severe stretch of the imagination.  And so, I respectfully declined the offer. No hard feelings. Just the wrong fit.  About a year later I bumped into the same hiring manager…

The fastest way to go out of business is to be religious about how you make your money.  And I mean that in a strategic sense, not a spiritual one.  It has nothing to do with god and everything to do with growth. After all, the word religion literally means to link back. It’s the one thing in your life that everything else in your life links back to.  And so,…