Rumi said that our task is not to seek love, but to find all the barriers within ourselves that we have built against it. 

What’s interesting is, so much of life works the same way. 

These things that we deeply desire, like happiness and joy and satisfaction and fulfillment, they aren’t so much pursued as they are allowed. They show up in our lives because of the permission we give ourselves. 

Guilt, for example, is a common barrier we use to hold ourselves back. An excuse we use not to move forward and face the next step. And a restraint we use to handicap our potential. 

Because that’s the guilt story we’ve bought into. That we’re not worthy of receiving. That we’re not whatever enough to welcome in any more. 

And as a result, we withhold joy from ourselves, starving our souls for the nutrition they need most. 

When the healthier response is to create that portal. To own our talent, accept our success, enjoy our status and give ourselves credit for the genuine value we provide and the meaningful contribution we make. 

Sound like a of work? 

It certainly is. But only in the beginning. Because once that joy portal opens, there’s no going back. There’s no rehab program for being addicted to giving yourself permission. 

Once you’ve crossed that line, you can rarely cross back over. 

Once you’ve tasted what it’s like on the other side, good luck trying to guilt yourself away from joy ever again. 

LET ME ASK YA THIS…

When will you free yourself from the subconscious mechanisms of guilt that limit your happiness? 

* * * *

Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Author. Speaker. Strategist. Inventor. Filmmaker. Publisher. Songwriter.  

[email protected]

www.nametagscott.com

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Thank god other people can’t hear the screaming inside my head, because the thoughts that seize me upon awakening are relentless. 

Sometimes I feel like I need a defense team to fight the sea of voices clamoring for a hearing. Racing to keep pace with my own neural impulses, it’s like a second job. 

But that’s okay. I accept and understand that I have been endowed by nature with a brain that can race. 

Maisel’s insightful research about why smart people hurt calls this state racing brain syndrome. The therapist explains that when we’re dealing with a racing brain that doesn’t come with an off switch or a break pedal, it inclines itself toward insomnia, mania, obsession, compulsion and addiction. 

And so, it’s driven by a certain powerful pressure or need or impulse, accompanied by the feeling that we simply must get on with whatever it’s proposing. 

As such, I have become skilled at quieting the monster inside my head. It has taken many years to master this conditioning technique, but it works wonders. Here’s the essence of it:

Instead of tossing and turning and crashing and banging around and around on the endless racetrack of compulsive thoughts, I firmly turn my attention to something else. 

Instead of allowing myself to become totally consumed with intrusive and irrational thoughts until I actually raise my pulse and blood pressure, I firmly turn my attention to something else. 

Instead of allowing the thief inside my head to steal away my joy, I firmly turn my attention to something else. 

Instead of trying to control and judge and bully the murmuring stream of thoughts that runs along my mind, I firmly turn my attention to something else. 

Are you noticing a pattern? 

Channel those neurons elsewhere. Make the mental railroad switch. Spend your energy on a new pursuit. And the voices will go away. 

It’s like my yoga teacher always says. 

The brain is a bad neighborhood. Stay out of it. 

Don’t allow yourself to become unceremoniously yanked around by your thoughts. Turn your attention to something else. 

Yeats famously prayed:

God guard me from the thoughts men think. 

But with so many questions and voices and ideas inside my head, spinning like plates on sticks, perhaps the thoughts of other men aren’t our problem. 

LET ME ASK YA THIS…

Do you tend to underestimate the extent to which your own hostile thoughts impact your life?

* * * *

Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Author. Speaker. Strategist. Inventor. Filmmaker. Publisher. Songwriter.  

[email protected]

www.nametagscott.com

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Phelps is the most decorated olympian in history. 

After twenty five years of work, he’s earned all the medals, shattered all the records, won all the awards and secured his spot in the history books as one of the most elite athletes of our time. 

Mission accomplished. 

And yet, that doesn’t mean he’s finished swimming. Far from it. Even in his retirement, the guy still shows up to the pool. Every day. 

The only difference is, now the pool holds a different meaning. 

Phelps swims because he loves it, not because he desperately needs the world to love him for it. 

And that’s the most inspiring part about his journey. He proves that once we’ve done enough to be okay with ourselves, we don’t necessarily have to stop doing the thing we do. We simply make the choice to shift the way we do it. 

That’s the unexpected reward of success. Our brain chemistry changes. After a certain number of years, the motivational priorities of our mind get permanently altered. The reasons that used to drive grow old and lose their power. 

And suddenly, we’re free to do things from a newer and cleaner and richer place. 

We can show up at the pool not because we have to, not because we need to, not because we’re expected to and not because it’s our job. 

But because we want to. Because we love it. Because it’s who we are in our bones. 

The effort doesn’t come from a place that’s in any way unwholesome. 

Our nervousness can find a place of rest and allow the soul to appear. 

LET ME ASK YA THIS…

Are you doing what you do from a place of joy and abundance, or from a place of proving and striving?

* * * *

Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Author. Speaker. Strategist. Inventor. Filmmaker. Publisher. Songwriter.  

[email protected]

www.nametagscott.com

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After a certain point, I don’t need any more me. 

It’s one thing to care deeply about enhancing my relationship with myself, it’s another thing to disappear down the rabbit hole of my own mythology. 

That’s why it’s so delightful to ground myself in the material world. It forces me to express fascination with something other than my own worries. It tests me to overcome my antisocial tendencies, get the hell out of the house bring me out of the ridiculous running commentary inside my heads and into the context of other people. 

The soul needs that. Regular escorting out of the ether and into the realm of the actual. 

No more theory, only practice. 

It’s a form of social mindfulness, really. 

Instead of getting stuck in a circle trying to regulate by ourselves, we reach for the other. 

Instead of losing ourselves in a narrative that exists up in our head and is divorced from the realities of daily existence, we can actually do things that help others thrive. 

It’s a never ending practice. 

Each of us has dense layers of selfishness to dissolve. 

Each of us has antisocial tendencies to contend with. 

Each of us needs to step outside of ourselves and appreciate the independent existence of other people. 

LET ME ASK YA THIS…

Are you going out of your way to honor the part of you that is not satisfied with a life of estrangement and isolation?
* * * *

Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Author. Speaker. Strategist. Inventor. Filmmaker. Publisher. Songwriter.  

[email protected]

www.nametagscott.com

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In
the recovery world, addicts learn that healing is a byproduct of learning to
embrace their own history. 

That’s the beautiful thing about the past. We
don’t have to let go of it, we only have to own it. To change our relationship
with it. To look back at an outdated version of ourselves with a forgiving
heart and accept that we were merely acting on what we believed to be true
about ourselves, at that point in time. 

It’s the best we could so with the
information we were given. 

I have a friend whose email signature has a great
quotation. 

“Blame not this machine, for it is made by humans, both glorious and
frail.” 

That’s the type of compassion and understanding we must extend to
ourselves. Not only because it reduces our overall level of suffering around
our own imperfection, but also because once we change the way we forgive the
shameful things within ourselves, suddenly, they no longer seem to bother us in
others. 

It’s the strangest thing. Our history affects other people’s future. And what’s really cool is, the process works both ways. 

Reminds of an old interview with a comedian about the launch of his latest television show. 

Louie said that the premise of this series was about the relationships between
the various members of a family and the future of the bar they had owned for
multiple generations. And when asked about the inspiration for the topic, he
said the following:

My family is part of me. And if I can accept them, not
forgive or even like them, but accept them, and be open to them in my life,
then that I can accept and be open to parts of myself that I have a hard time
with. 

Proving, that once we finally clear the wreckage of feelings about the
past, both we and the people we love can finally be free. 

LET ME ASK YA THIS…

What might you be missing out on by regretting the past and wishing to shut the door on it?
* * * *

Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Author. Speaker. Strategist. Inventor. Filmmaker. Publisher. Songwriter.  

[email protected]

www.nametagscott.com

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Each of us must know when to use our voice, and know when to use our silence. 

Because on one hand, silence can be a profound relief. A place of peace where we don’t have to perform or be anyone or do anything. And in a noisy, crowded, over stimulated world, that almost sounds like a luxury good. An act of useful employment. 

That’s why I accept what comes from silence and make the best I can of it. I tolerate quiet periods of unknowing. I welcome every layer of stillness. And I try not to break the silence unless I can improve upon it. 

But I also remember that the moments I most regret in life were my silences. Those instances when I had front row tickets to the what I should have said theater, and I shut my mouth to the detriment of my spirit. 

What a mistake. What a missed opportunity to use my words and make a difference. ‘

Lorde, the famous civil rights activist, discovered that ending the silence marks a milestone on our healing path. It helps us break out of our isolation and discover that we’re not alone in our pain. 

In her groundbreaking book of speeches and essays about feminism, she said:

You’re never really a whole person if you remain silent, because there is always that one little piece inside you that wants to be spoken out, and if you keep ignoring it, it gets madder and madder and hotter and hotter, and if you don’t speak it out one day it will just up and punch you in the mouth from the inside. 

That’s what silence has the potential to become. A time bomb. A personal hell. A regret machine. An inner saboteur keeping us from taking risks. 

Secrets, secrets, are no fun. Secrets, secrets, hurt someone. 

Silence, then, is a multifaceted and ambiguous phenomenon. 

It’s the frenemy of man. 

And it’s our job to respect both sides of it. 

LET ME ASK YA THIS…

How are you developing a relationship with silence?

* * * *

Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Author. Speaker. Strategist. Inventor. Filmmaker. Publisher. Songwriter.  

[email protected]

www.nametagscott.com

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Woody was once asked if he ever read stories about himself in the tabloids. 

To which he responded, never, ever, ever. 

In his younger years, perhaps, but the filmmaker said that now he scrupulously avoids any self preoccupation. His true enjoyment comes from project itself. And when it’s over, when he’s made his movie, he moves on. He never looks at the film again or reads anything about it. 

Coming from one of my creative heroes, this approach to work is absolutely inspiring to me. Because I feel the same way. All I ever wanted to do as a writer was make art, share it with the world and then get back to work. 

That’s a joyous celebration for me. 

But this insane, capitalistic notion that once the art is done, then the real work starts, that’s pure torture for me. I don’t want to be the daddy of a whole universe. Spending the next twelve months on a thirty city tour, schlepping around the nation trying to sell and promote and deconstruct and build community around this work of art that I never want to look at again, no thanks. 

I am in the business of making art, not marketing it. 

All that matters to me is how I grow as a person during the process. 

That’s payment enough. 

Everything else is bullshit. 

In the words of another one of my creative heroes, I don’t want to sail in the boat, I just enjoy building it. 

LET ME ASK YA THIS…

Are you trapped in the wrong business?

* * * *

Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Author. Speaker. Strategist. Inventor. Filmmaker. Publisher. Songwriter.  

[email protected]

www.nametagscott.com

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Inhibition hurts me faster than anything. 

It’s the bait that can kill my spirit of right action. 

And so, any time I sit down to work and a sense of hopelessness threatens to overwhelm me, I remind myself that movement is my mainstay. That as soon as I start doing what I can from where I am, taking small steps that allow me keep my equilibrium, the weight will lift. 

The fear will fade. And once I taste those first fruits of progress, I will be ready to ride the waves of chaos that come at me. 

Besides, no matter how organized and prepared and confident I am in the moment, odds are, I’ve probably taken action on less than that before. 

My friend who wrote a book about quantum physics says that motion organizes and creates order. In his research, he found that through motion, all things tend to their equilibrium and find their place in the universe, conspiring towards some unifying geometrical situation. 

It’s the theory of gravitational order. 

Proving, that when we’re strong enough to step forward, life will reward us. Not often as quickly or as perfectly as we’d hope. But remember, it’s not about getting things right, it’s about getting things moving in the right direction. And trusting that your spirit is large enough for any circumstance. 

It’s time to put your helplessness behind you. Start moving as an act of faith in yourself. Tolerate the way you progress. Take satisfaction from small steps. And be proud of every step you take. 

Because even if you’re moving slowly, you’re still moving forward. 

LET ME ASK YA THIS…

Are you focusing on heroics, or small concrete actions that accumulate to achieve effectiveness?

* * * *

Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Author. Speaker. Strategist. Inventor. Filmmaker. Publisher. Songwriter.  

[email protected]

www.nametagscott.com

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It’s tempting to lay wide awake, waiting for the other shoe to fall,
expecting our abundance to prove itself temporary and a lie. 

Because from an
evolutionary perspective, there’s this anxious part of ourselves that believes
if we’re not worrying, we’re being irresponsible. 

If we’re not feeling the
pinch of panic at least some of the
time, we’re growing complacent and setting ourselves up for risk and putting
ourselves in harm’s way. 

It’s a perfectly human reaction. Carrying ourselves as
though braced for the worst inoculates us from danger. 

The problem is, the
moment something triggers our anxiety, we are no longer living in joy. It’s
like a dormant virus that wakes up when stress weakens the immune system. And
it makes us feel like crap. 

This is too good to be true. I must have gotten
away with something. I’m only here on a technicality. Looks like I pulled
another fast one on the world. Better enjoy it while it lasts. 

That’s no way to live. Persistent concern about negative recurrence and
uncertainty about the future might make us feel noble and heroic, but it also sabotages
our joy. 

It’s like guy who scores a date with the girl that he thinks is way
too beautiful for him. Trapped in his trance of unworthiness, he spends
the entire evening wondering what the hell she sees in him and forgets to enjoy
the view. 

What a waste. 

The goal is to convince ourselves that wherever
we have arrived is permissible, earned and exactly where we need to be right
now. The goal is to be ready to revel in the beauty of what is unfolding, not
just be a good sport and roll over for whatever disaster the universe has in
store for us next. 

And one day, should it all up and disappear like a fart in
the wind, we give thanks for the time we had with it and trust that our divine
supply will replenish when the time is right.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…

Have you seduced yourself into thinking that your joy is not here but there, somewhere in the future?

* * * *

Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Author. Speaker. Strategist. Inventor. Filmmaker. Publisher. Songwriter.  

[email protected]

www.nametagscott.com

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When difficult emotions come pouring in, we’re told that we have three options to cope with the threat of danger. 

Fight, flight or freeze. 

We can fight, which might mean crying, punching, grinding our teeth or other expressions of anger. 

We can flight, which might mean restless leg movement, darting eyes or physically running away. 

We can freeze, which might mean holding our breath, feeling an overwhelming sense of dread or, my childhood preference, playing dead, face down in the snow until they either pity you or assume you’re unconscious. 

Fight, flight, freeze. 

Those are the three most well documented responses. 

However, there’s a fourth option people rarely talk about. My therapist taught me this many years ago. 

Friend. 

I was going through a deeply anxious period, searching for tools to eliminate my stress, when he asked an unexpected question. 

How good are you at loving your stress? 

That opened my eyes to a new way of approaching anxiety. It taught me to make space for my fears. To respect them. Express gratitude towards them. Even start a dialogue with them. 

Saying to myself:

Well hello there fear, nice to see you again. Thank you for trying to help me today. I think I may have found another way of moving forward, and I appreciate what you’re trying to do for me. Thanks for your efforts. See you next time. 

It really works. Friending my emotions has been the single best strategy for diffusing stress in any situation. And it’s not some new age strategy for achieving pseudo enlightenment. The science has been proven. 

Lodrick’s research on psychological trauma explains that friending is the earliest defensive strategy available to us. Throughout life, when fearful, most humans will activate their social engagement system. It’s their friend response to threat. 

Like the child who smiles or even laughs when being chastised. To smile when fearful is likely to be an unconscious attempt to engage socially with the person causing the fear. 

And so, when fighting, fighting or freezing responses aren’t available to us, we can always try friending. 

Accepting difficult emotions as a part of us, deciding that they’re not something we need to kill, and then putting our arm around them and saying, thank you for sharing. 

LET ME ASK YA THIS…

What kind of relationship do you have with your own emotions?* * * *

Scott Ginsberg

That Guy with the Nametag

Author. Speaker. Strategist. Inventor. Filmmaker. Publisher. Songwriter.  

[email protected]

www.nametagscott.com

It’s the world’s first, best and only product development and innovation gameshow!

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Join our community of innovators, artists and entrepreneurs.